


Your Name

by DemiKind



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Middle School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bilingual Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron), Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gay Keith (Voltron), Gen, Happy Ending, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I love time travel au's mate, Keith (Voltron) Needs a Hug, Korean Keith (Voltron), Lance (Voltron) is a Dork, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Langst, M/M, Nonbinary Pidge | Katie Holt, Orphan Keith (Voltron), POV Keith (Voltron), Socially Awkward Keith (Voltron), Teen Angst, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Young Keith Kogane, i wrote this before krolia existed sorry y'all, klance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-22
Updated: 2018-10-23
Packaged: 2019-01-04 04:35:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 35,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12161646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DemiKind/pseuds/DemiKind
Summary: In 2008, 6th grader Lance McClain went missing.In 2017, 21-year-old Keith Kogane's friends have nearly moved on. But after mysterious circumstances, Keith finds himself back in 2008 in his 7th-grade body. Within four days, he has to find out how to save the boy he never knew before he disappears forever.





	1. The Butterfly

**Author's Note:**

> This is rated T for Teen, but there are mature themes due to strong language, verbal abuse, harassment, and homophobia/biphobia.  
> If there are any posts about my story on Tumblr, please use the hashtag #voltronyourname if you want me to see it. Please try to use that tag, as I want to easily be able to find your posts, but note, I want to keep smut and NSFW unassociated with my story as much as possible.
> 
> This fic is based on multiple series and factors. It's largely influenced by Life is Strange (a video game), Erased (a kickass anime and manga), a few poems my friend has written, and conversations I've had with friends about story ideas. It's not my intention to copy anything exactly from any of my influences, either. I respect them all and hope that I can use their influence to make my story idea a bit better.
> 
> This fic is gonna be messy, but that's okay. I hope you enjoy my mess.

 

 

 

 

 

> The voice echoed in his head.

_Do you remember me?_

_Do you remember my name?_

This voice... There's something about his voice...

_Your name..._

_You don't remember. Do you?_

_I guess I really was easy to forget. I was right..._

What am I missing? Why can't I remember?

Your name is what? _What's your name?_

_Was I that forgettable?_

_I can't hear you..._

_God damn it... WHAT IS IT?! What's your name?!_

 

Sadly, all that was left was a void. He had forgotten.

 

 

**October 27th, 2017**

**6:53**

Keith woke up to the sound of his alarm blazing in his ears. He sat up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. _How long was I out..._ he thought to himself. Too long. That's all he needed to know. He looked over to see a buzz on his phone. All he could see were the blurs of names on his messages app. _Oh no..._ He thought as he begrudgingly opened his phone.

GROUP CHAT - LAB DORKS 

6:30 

 

Pidge

 Guys our final starts in a half an hour where the fuck are you guys.

 

Takashi/Shiro

 I'm already heading to the lab, Katie.

 

Hunk

He’s allowed to call you Katie and I'm not? Uncool.

 

Pidge

I prefer Pidge but Shiro's friends with my brother.

 

Pidge

 That means he's the ONLY one allowed to call me that. Capiche?

 

Hunk

Fine. I'm going back to sleep now.

 

Pidge

 OH HELL NO. YOU'RE GONNA COME DOWN AND STUDY WITH US.

 

Hunk

 Some of us need our sleep Pidge. And you just woke me up. I didn't need this.

 

Pidge

 We should cram as much as we can into this final before it actually starts.

 

Hunk

 Fine. I'm already awake. I'll be down soon. I can't say how long it'll take Keith though.

 

Pidge

K

 

6:47

 

Pidge 

Keith wake the fuck up.

 

6:51

 

Pidge 

Hunk's on his way up. I hate you.

 

Keith turned his phone off and just sat on his bed. He couldn't remember his dream, but something about it was bothering him. What was that dream? What was it? Keith's train of thought was almost automatically interrupted by Hunk barging into his room.

 "Hunk, what the hell?! I could've been naked!" Keith looked down at himself. He was wearing black and red plaid pajama pants, but no shirt. And to be honest, there was probably nothing on underneath the PJ pants.

Hunk picked a shirt up off of Keith's floor and tossed it to him. "I'm saving your butt." Hunk continued to toss a pair of black slippers over to Keith. "I'll be waiting for you in the chem lab. Don't be late, dude. It's finals!" That’s when Hunk ran out of the room.

Keith sighed and proceeded to throw on the shirt and slippers. The shirt was disgusting. It smelled of B.O. (even though Keith does wear deodorant. He just wears the shirt too much.) and it was covered in cup noodle stains. The slippers were also filthy, but that's just because he's had them for years. Black slippers with tiny lions on them. Keith put them on and ran his hand through his hair and along his neck. _Am I sweating?_  He thought. Keith glanced at his pillow. Apparently, he was sweating while he was sleeping. A lot. It made his uneasy feeling just grow. As Keith stood to leave, he felt like something was wrong.

_What happened in that damn dream?_

9:15am

 "Welp, I think I did pretty well." a confident Pidge exclaimed at their break table, "How about you guys?" Around the table, everyone looked like a different brand of miserable. Pidge and Shiro were the only ones truly prepared for that test, yet Shiro still looked defeated. Hunk was eating some baby carrots, he looked half asleep. He could probably be sleep-eating for all they knew. Allura was sitting on the bench, but her torso was on the table. She was exhausted, and the only way they could tell that she was even alive was by her breathing (and slight snoring, but nobody minded). Shiro was reading a language textbook, for whatever final was for whatever class he had next. Keith sat with his head resting on his hand, leaning against the table.

"I think it's safe to say you're the only one who's that confident, Pidge-Old-Pal," Hunk exclaimed. He opened his mouth to continue his thought but was interrupted by a ringing cell phone. Hunk looked at it and his eyes got a bit wider. "Sorry guys, give me a few minutes." Hunk answered the phone and walked to a bench away from the table to talk to whoever was on the other line.

Keith looked at Hunk for a minute before turning to Pidge and Shiro. "Have you two noticed that Hunk's been a bit less... 'Hunk' today?"

Pidge nodded, "This happens every year around this day. It's when his best friend disappeared. Well, _our_ best friend disappeared."

Keith glanced down for a minute. He knew Hunk's told them all about this before, but he was too busy with his own issues to listen to Hunk. He felt guilty asking again, but he was actually curious. "So-"

"You want to know what happened because you forgot, huh?" Keith lowered his head and nodded. Pidge sighed and put their book down. "Hunk and I were pretty good friends with this one dude before you moved to your final foster home in our area. We all were pretty good friends, but Hunk was closer to him. At the time I was mostly trying to out-do Matt when it came to smarts, so I'd study while they hung out a lot. They were as bro-y as bros could get. It was pretty funny." Pidge chuckled to themselves and pushed up their glasses. "I think you might've met him actually. At least, briefly. You got here a week or so before his disappearance."

"I was?"

"Yeah. Do you remember his name?" Pidge waited for a response.

Keith shook his head. For some reason, it was really frustrating him. _What's wrong with you, Keith? What's so bad about this kid? You knew this kid!_

"His name was Lance."

Lance.

_Lance._

Keith's head was pounding. What the hell is going on? Keith sat in silence for a minute before noticing an important detail about Pidge's phrasing.

"What do you mean, 'His name _was_ Lance'?"

Pidge just shrugged. "He's been missing for nine years. He might be dead for all we know."

"Missing.." Keith was just thinking to himself out loud at this point, "What happened?"

Pidge shrugged again (Keith hated this about Pidge. They shrugged too much), "Nobody knows. My theory is that he ran away. I know some shit was happening to him at the time."

Keith narrowed his eyes, "What kind of shit-"

"GUYS!"

Keith was cut off by Hunk running in a Huff over to the group. He had awoken Allura, who jumped up and accidentally elbowed Shiro in the chest, which caused him to drop the book on the table and yelp.

Pidge just rolled their eyes, "Quite the wakeup call there, Hunk."

"Pidge! More important things."

Allura rubbed her eyes and looked up, "What is it, Hunk? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Well... We just might."

"What do you mean?" Pidge asked.

"It's Lance."

Pidge, Shiro, and Allura gasped. Keith looked at the three, then back to Hunk.

 Allura looked ready to cry, "What about Lance?!"

Hunk looked slightly scared, "I don't know much... I just know they found him."

In that moment, everything around them froze. Keith's eyes went wide. The mention of this boy.. this boy he doesn't even remember... Why is he making Keith so curious? Why does he want to know more about him? Everything was in slow motion. The only thing that caught Keith's eye was a deep blue butterfly. As if Keith could move a bit faster than before, he reached for the butterfly.

_Remember... Keith.._

It was within his grasp.

_Don't you want to remember me?_

_Remember..._

Desperation. That was all in his mind.

_The butterfly._

_There it is. I can reach it... I can-_

"KEITH!"

Hunk's call brought everything back to normal. Keith realized that he was just grabbing at air, and ended up falling off of the bench. He blinked and realized he was on the ground. There was no butterfly... What happened?

"Nevermind, Keith." Shiro exclaimed, "Where's Lance?"

"At the hospital near the train station. Some of his family's already there." Hunk replied, quickly and as if he was spitting out the words.

Allura stood up, "I'll get the car!" she exclaimed. And off she ran to get her SUV.

Keith stood up and looked around. Was that real? He asked himself. And if so, what was that?

Pidge walked over, "You okay, man? It looks like you just saw a ghost."

Keith shook his head, "Oh.. Uh.. Yeah... I'm good."

Pidge shrugged, "If you say so, man."

Shiro was packing up his and Allura's stuff on the other side of the table/bench thing until his phone vibrated.

 "Allura's in the car. Let's get to the curb, guys." Shiro just picked up the rest of the textbooks and didn't bother to put them in a bag. He just ran. Hunk and Pidge followed. Keith ran after, but he was worried about what they might find in that hospital room.

10:30am 

It was an hour drive to the train station, but the ride seemed to last only ten or twenty minutes. It made Keith rather anxious, the entire car ride was tense. He hates situations that are too tense; with too much anxious energy. Keith was honestly surprised Allura didn't crash her poor car. He was grateful they arrived in one piece when they got to the hospital. One of the Lance-kid's uncles or something had name badges for all of them. Everyone got a badge with their names, Keith's was a bit off though. His read "Keyth". Still better than nothing, though. They got to the hospital room, and there were a couple of people around. Keith noticed some certain people before he saw Lance himself. One was an older woman clutching a tan hand and saying things to him in Spanish (his mother who was holding his hand, most likely).

 Another was a girl saying, "Does this mean I have another tio now? Please?" and there was a woman (her mother?) consoling her. There were a few other people he didn't know, but they were all speaking Spanish, so Keith didn't think too much of them. Hunk kneeled next to the bed, sobbing, and everyone else was talking amongst themselves. Keith heard a beeping and then found himself drawn to the heartbeat monitor. He noticed it was slow.. Then getting slower. Keith looked around, nobody seemed to notice, they were all too caught up in their own conversations to notice.

"Guys.." Keith started saying.. Then the heartbeat monitor seemed to get louder.

_Beep_

_Beep_

"Guys!"

_Beep_

Keith looked around. That monitor was beating too slow. He'd seen those monitors too many times in his life. Then, just like earlier, time seemed to move so slow... It almost seemed to stop. The monitor read only one heartbeat. And that's when Keith saw him. This Lance they were all talking about. And all of a sudden, he felt like he had been smacked in the face... Or stabbed in the chest... The boy in the bed had a face drained of color. And his body was lifeless. But before the boy's eyes closed. Keith and the boy locked eyes. Those eyes... Like deep blue oceans. They sparkled. They were kind. _Those eyes..._

 

_Beep_

 

The boy's eyes shut. And his oceans were gone. No. No this can't be it. _NO!_ Keith was frozen. He looked around and everyone was still in slow motion. But the sounds of conversation stopped at once. _This isn't it... It can't be, right? I just found him…._ “Don't go yet... Please..” Keith whispered to himself, “I don’t even know you yet. I need to know you.”

_Then come know me._

That's when Keith saw it again. From the corner of his eye.

The butterfly.

Everything still seemed frozen. But no hesitation this time. Keith leaped at the butterfly. And instead of catching it, the butterfly flew to his chest. And while there were people crying around him, the butterfly found its way _into_ his heart. Keith felt like pins and needles were striking his body as if his body fell asleep. It hurt until it caused so much pain, it caused him to go numb. He felt light as a feather. As everything faded from his vision, he looked at his outstretched hand from when he leaped.

His hand was fading.

What was happening?

_I hope you do want to know me, Keith Kogane. I want to know you._

 

That's when everything went black.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_I’m now walking along a sidewalk._

_Just walking. Reaching into pockets, there was a small box._

_Cigarettes._

_I thought I stopped smoking..._

_Laughing. There were two boys laughing, and a girl reading but following closely behind them._

_The tallest one ran up to me and asked for my name. I said it was Keith._

_I asked what the date was._

_The tall boy said October 23rd, 2008._

_I asked for his name._

_He smiled._

_"Hi! I'm Lance! Welcome to the neighborhood!"_

That's when it hit me.

_I'm twelve. I just moved to a new foster home._

_Most importantly, I'm here._

_It's now 4 days before Lance McClain went missing._

_Wait for a second..._

 

 

_There's a dead kid in front of me._

 

** October 23rd, 2008 **

8:05am

That's all Keith could think about. There's a dead kid in front of me. A kid who went missing. A kid so many people cared about. Keith could recognize the other boy and girl immediately; Katie and Hunk (this was before Pidge came out as agender. They were still going by their birth name.. This'll be weird).

"I didn't know there was gonna be a new kid! Cool!"

"It's a 7th grader, Hunk. That's why we didn't know." ~~Pidge~~ Katie added.

"How do you know?"

Pidge smirked, "I skipped a grade. I know everything."

"Shut up, Katie. You may have skipped a grade," Lance added, hands on his hips, "But I got my smokin' hot looks that help me know everything." Lance winks at Pidge, who just rolled their eyes.

"Please don't make that a regular thing. It's annoying. And you're twelve, not 'smokin' hot'." Pidge pushed up their glasses and (finally) put their book away.

"I dunno, I think it's pretty cool." Hunk shrugged.

"Of course it's cool! It's me!" Lance added. Geez, this kid is loud. Keith couldn't tell if it was an act, or if this kid was just kinda stupid. "Hey, earth to new-kid. Ya still there?"

Keith blinked and realized he hasn't said or done anything. "Oh, yeah. Here. Sorry."

Hunk smiled and placed a hand on Keith's shoulder, "It's okay, dude. But remember, emos are teased so maybe zip up your jacket before you get to school and kids see your shirt."

Keith's eyes widen as he looks down at his shirt and sees it. An MCR concert T-Shirt. He thought he was so edgy in seventh grade...  Oh god... Why seventh grade. 

"Matt likes that band. You two would probably be good friends." Pidge chuckled.

Keith opens his mouth to speak, but remembers that he's not supposed to know these people that well yet, "Who's Matt?"

"Katie's cool 8th grade brother. He's friends with Shiro, this other cool 8th grader. I want to be friends with him because he's good with astrology and shit but she won't introduce me to either of them." Lance announced, shooting a glance at ~~Pid-~~ I mean Katie. ( _Two different people, Keith._ He thought to himself. _Two different people._ )

Hunk looked at his wrist-watch and looked kind of nervous, "Um, guys? School starts in 15 minutes."

"Chill, Hunk." Lance said, leaning against Hunk's shoulder, "We got plenty of time."

"I think you mean _We've_ got plenty of time."

"Jesus christ, Katie."

It was funny. Lance wasn't saying anything in a mean way, he was just being playful. At least, that's what his tone of voice seemed to tell. 

Hunk looked at Lance, "Dude, can we please get going? You know I hate being late."

Lance just chuckled, "Fine, man."

The three started walking, and Lance gestured for Keith to walk with them.  Keith remembered the school wasn't that far away. Hunk and Katie seemed happy, and this Lance kid was all in all, pretty funny.  What a weird time. The music was different, people dressed completely differently, and Hunk and Katie seemed happier. Was it because of Lance? Or was it just because they were kids? The air got colder as they walked to school, but everyone was still laughing and joking as if everything was completely okay. But something was bothering Keith, Why couldn't he remember this? Did this conversation even happen when he moved here?  _No.._ He thought.  _I just kept walking before. I put on my headphones and walked without saying anything. I remember thinking the people behind me were annoying._ Keith felt his stomach drop. All he could feel is guilt. These nice people, his friends, were annoying to him. Just because he thought he was too cool for them. They were just boys.. and Katie.

 

2:20pm

Fun fact about sixth grade Keith: He never brought a lunch. Now, 21-year-old Keith didn't know that. And 21-year-old Keith in 12-year-old Keith's body wasn't too pleased.

He was sitting alone under a tree. Keith remembered that he used to sit and read under this tree every day, he preferred reading over socializing. Glancing over, he saw his friends at a picnic table; Hunk, Pidge, Shiro, Matt, and Lance (although he and Lance weren't exactly friends). They were all laughing and talking, it just made Keith feel weird. Everyone seemed a lot closer, everything was more  _innocent_. Keith closed his eyes and breathed in and out slowly. He never had anything like that growing up. He never wanted to let people in. There were too many foster families, too much risk of hurting himself or others. Keith already knew that this would be his final foster family, so many he can try harder to have those friendships he wished he had. Keith sat up and looked at the table where his friends sat. Lance looked over and waved, mouthing "Come over" extravagantly. Keith smiled to himself and walked over. 

"Welcome to hell, my dude." Katie said, putting her book down.

"Well, I wouldn't call it that." Shiro chimed in, happily. Lance stared at Shiro with admiration in his eyes 

 _"Lance always admired Shiro, he thought of him as a brother. Shiro feels guilty about not talking to Lance enough."_ Keith could hear Hunk saying in his head a few weeks before. Keith blinked and looked at the both of them.

"So, Lance, What's his name?" Keith asked, gesturing towards Shiro.

Lance's eyes lit up, "This is Shiro! He's cool, huh?"

"Nah, I'm not that cool," Shiro laughed, shaking his head.

"On the contrary," Keith chuckled, "You all are super cool."

"Why thank you, I pride myself in being the coolest one of the bunch." Hunk said, mimicking the way Lance seemed to move and speak.

"No way, Hunk!" Lance exclaimed, standing up. "I don't have a lisp!"

"You have a slight lisp," Katie chimed in.

"No, I don't!"

Keith just sat there chuckling and staring at this boy. He overreacts and is loud, but he's funny. And kind of stupid but in a nice way. He's friendly and kind and he seems sweet.  _What else should I know about you, Lance McClain? I want to know you._

"Dude." Katie chimed in, snapping her fingers in front of Keith, snapping him out of his daydream, "You good?

"Shit what? Oh. Yeah." Keith nodded.

"Dude are you gay?"

Keith's eyes got huge and he sat up straight, "Uh.."

"KATIE!" 

"What, Matt?"

"You can't just say that!"

"What? I'm legitimately asking."

Matt stood up, "Dude, I'm so sorry."

Keith shook his head and chuckled, "Don't worry about it, I don't care."

"Wait," Katie asked, "So, are you?"

Keith shrugged.

Katie laughed, "Oh man. Hey Lance? How's it hangin' on your end?"

Lance's face was bright red, "I'm fine. This just is an odd occurrence."

"How so?" Keith asked,

"I've never had an emo make me blush."

"Oh that's just offensive."

"Guys this is gay."

"KATIE!"

Everyone just laughed. And on that note, the bell rang and lunch was over.

4:30pm

The air was cold and bitter, and of course, Keith only brought a leather jacket.  

"You're not an edgelord, motherfucker." Keith mouthed to himself. He pulled out his (fingerless) gloves and put them on begrudgingly. He sat on the stairs and thought about this boy for a minute, and his situation. _How am I here? Why am I here? What am I supposed to do? Who is-_

"Hey you!"

Keith turned around and saw Lance standing at the top of the stairs. He was wearing a blue coat over a hoodie and then another hoodie. He looked like an overly-happy blueberry. It bothered Keith but it still made him chuckle.

"Hey you, yourself." Keith smirked, "What're you doing here so late?"

"You ask a lot of questions."

"And you're a hypocrite."

"Fair point."

"Well, may I have an answer?"

Lance walked down the stairs and sat on the bottom step. "Avoiding the walk home. It's hard to move in these layers."

Keith just chuckled. 

"What?"

"You look like a blueberry, you know that?"

"Well, I do now." Lance snorted, "Speaking of which, are you not freezing right now?"

Keith just looked at his feet, then back up at Lance. An awkward smile grew on his face, basically saying "Help". Lance chuckled and took off one of his layers of coat, the puffy blue one, and handed it to Keith. Keith just looked at the jacket, then back at Lance. Keith took the jacket and put it on. The jacket was already pretty warm, and it was comfortable. Keith stood up and adjusted the sleeves.

"Well, how to I look?" Keith asked, mimicking a stereotypical teenage girl.

Lance snorted again, "Uh.. I don't think blue's your color, buddy."

"You saying I can't rock the blueberry look?

"Yes."

"Damn."

The boys burst into laughter, but Keith didn't exactly know why. He never had any conversations like this when he was younger. " _Am I messing with time?_ " he thought to himself. _Should I be more careful?_  Keith sat next to Lance on the step and took a deep breath. He could see his breath against the cold air. He looked around and took it all in. He felt so small. He felt short and out of control on his life again. He put his hands in his pockets and felt his cigarettes.  _My lungs are fucked up because of these..._ Keith thought, then found himself craving it. He was still twelve in this timeline, and he used to smoke at least twice a day.  _I don't want to think about this dark fucking time._ Keith thought, squeezing the pack of cigarettes. It was bad enough that he was already back here. He pulled the pack out of his pocket, his hand had nearly crushed it, but the cigarettes were still in okay condition. The urge was strong, Keith just tried to ignore it.

_~~Put it to your lips. Light it.~~_

_No, I don't want to do that._

_~~Do it, Keith. Take the pain away. It's okay.~~ _

_Shut up..._

_~~You want to, you crave it.~~ _

_Stop!_

Before Keith could snap back to reality, he felt someone grab the pack from his hand. Keith realized Lance had taken it and thrown it into a gutter on the sidewalk.

"What the hell are you thinking?! If anyone sees you with those, you're screwed!"

"You had no right to do that!" Keith yelled. He didn't know why he was yelling, he was glad it happened, but he was yelling.  _Shit._ He realized.  _I haven't been diagnosed yet._

"I've seen what cigarettes do! Don't be that fucking stupid!"

"What do you mean."

Lance hesitated before he spoke again, "I mean, don't be a fucking idiot." He stood up and slung his backpack over his shoulder, "Give me my jacket back tomorrow. The walk home'll be cold."

"Wait, you're going without me?" 

"I.. I'm late. I'm sorry. Just get home safe. I'll see you tomorrow, man." Lance waved and then bolted down the street.

Keith sighed and looked down at the bright blue jacket. He slung his backpack over his shoulder and began to walk down his street. The sunset was pretty and full of clouds, but Keith didn't pay much attention to it. He never liked sunsets. As he walked, he looked at the houses. There was laughing and lights on in all of the houses. One house caught his eye. He looked in the window and saw Lance's wavy brown hair and blue eyes in the window. He was laughing. He looked outside and saw Keith. The ocean-eyed boy waved, then ran off. Keith chuckled to himself, then continued walking down his street into the cold night.

_I've found you, Lance McClain. And I promise I'll find out how to save you._

 


	2. Nostalgia - Four Days Left

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith continues to learn more about Lance, and tries to figure out more about his situation and Lance's. How he got there, why he's here, and how he can prevent Lance's disappearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the comments on the previous chapter! I wrote this one as quick as I could, but I had an issue with my saving and it was all deleted and I had to start over. I hope you still enjoy it:)  
> ~check the endnotes for links to the songs used in this episode<3~

**October 23rd - Four days before Lance McClain went missing**

5:10pm 

Keith looked up at the two-story house in front of him thinking, _This place is bigger than I remember it._ The house was light grey with a dark brown door. There were stairs (Keith was standing at the bottom of them) that led up to a porch with a rocking chair and a welcome mat. The sun was nearly down now. All there was in the sky was a dark and deep periwinkle, you could almost see the stars reveal themselves in the sky. You could hear voices coming from inside the house, and it was the last thing Keith wanted to hear. He knew that his foster family were in there, a girl and two foster moms. And although they weren’t bad people in any way, Keith just didn’t want to be around anyone right now. He wanted to figure out what was happening, and why he was here. The boy sat on the bottom step, just as he did early with the ocean-eyed boy. _Lance._ He thought to himself.

“What’s going on?” Keith said to himself, looking at the sky. He looked around, seemingly trying to find an answer in the stars. “What am I even looking for here?”

_You’ll figure it out, I promise._

Keith quickly turned his head, almost panicking, and a blue butterfly flew passed by his right ear. It flew into Keith’s front yard, and as if he was a dog chasing a bone, Keith followed it. The butterfly landed on a lavender flower, and just stayed there, its wings moving slowly, but not to lift it off the ground. Keith sighed and sat down next to the plant. He looked at the butterfly for a minute or so, and it never flew away. Keith chuckled to himself and ran his fingers through his hair. He just looked at the butterfly as if it was the brightest star in the sky.

“Why did you bring me here?” Keith asked the butterfly, “What do you want me to do? Tell me what to do.” The butterfly lifted itself up and flew around Keith’s head, “What are you trying to tell me?”

_You’ll figure it out. I know you will._

“And what if I can’t?” Keith was getting frustrated with himself. The butterfly began to fly away, into the sky. “No... No, don’t go!” Keith chased the butterfly, he followed the butterfly down the street until he had to begin to run to keep up.

_You’ll figure it out._

“You can’t just say that!” Keith was crying now.

_I promise._

“Tell me what to do! I don’t know what to do! Don’t go, please..” Keith was running, but the butterfly was speeding up. The boy was choking on air and the saltiness of his tears.

_I love you._

“Who are you?!” Keith screamed at the butterfly, “This isn’t fair! Please! Who are you?!” and with that last word, Keith slid on the sidewalk and landed face-first on the pavement.

His knees and palms skidded across the sidewalk and he felt completely numb. “No..” He choked, sitting up. “Fuck..” His left cheek was cut, and his tears made it sting twice as badly. The palms of his hands and both of his knees were skinned and bleeding. “I’m a fucking idiot.” Keith looked up the sky to see that the stars were clearly visible now. “What do you want me to do, Lance?” Keith whispered to himself, “What’s wrong.. What’s going on..” he cried.

“What’s going on is that you were running and tripped and now you’re talking to yourself.”

Keith turned so quickly that he fell back onto his hands again.

“FUCK!” he swore, clutching his bleeding palms. He looked up to where the voice came from. And on a lit up porch, stood Lance McClain with a washcloth and a water bottle. The boy chuckled. “The hell are you laughing at?”

“Not at you particularly, if that’s what you’re wondering,” Lance said as he walked down the stairs and knelt next to Keith, “And I was only chuckling because it’s not likely that someone runs down the street screaming after dark.” Lance held out his hand, “May I?”

Keith reluctantly put his left hand in Lances. The ocean eyed boy poured some water out of the water bottle onto the hand and immediately put the towel on it.

"Ow," Keith snapped, tensing his hand, "That hurts like a motherfucker."

Lance just shrugged and held onto Keith's hand with the towel, "A thank you would suffice too. Or maybe even, a 'Gracias, mi amor!'" Lance exclaimed that last sentence dramatically, but it just confused Keith.

"What was that, Italian?"

Lance snorted again, "If I was only so lucky. Heh, I'm afraid not." Lance put Keith's hand down and took his right hand into his. Lance poured water onto the right hand, just as he'd done with Keith's left.

"Ow." Keith yelped, tensing again.

"If I could be more gentle, I would. Okay?" Lance shrugged, "I'm trying to help you out."

"I know.. Sorry."

"I know you are." Lance smiled and held the towel on Keith's hand, "Anyways, it was Spanish. I was kind of making fun of our little conversation earlier."

Keith's face turned bright red from embarrassment, "You mean the gay one?"

"Yup."

"What's there to make fun of? It was just a dumb conversation about me being the stereotypical gay emo."

"Nobody said anything about you being an emo in that conversation. Besides, you're far from it."

"You making fun of my brand, dude?"

Lance snorted. Again. Which was starting to annoy Keith at this point, "MCR t-shirts are emo, but you don't wear anything else that implies you're a stereotype. You just seem to like the band and that's it."

"Well, everyone else always said I was an emo douchebag. So whatever. Better to make peace with what they believe."

"I disagree with that."

Lance put his hand on Keith's shoulder, and that's when Keith realized he'd been staring at the ground. Not wanting to look up, he continued to stare.

"I believe that you should make peace with who _you_ are as a person before you even try to think about how others see you." Lance set down Keith's hand and began to repeat the same water-towel process with his knees. "You have to try to make yourself happy if you ever want to survive in this mess of a world, you know."

Keith chuckled, "You talk like you're way older than twelve, you know that?"

Lance smiled, "There you go, being a hypocrite again."

_Oh yeah. I'm twentyone. This is awkward._

"I've been in too many houses to talk like I'm twelve."

"And I have too many older and younger siblings to talk like I'm twelve."

"Fair point, I know the feeling."

Lance realized what that meant for Keith. He was an orphan. He had to try to stay strong no matter what. Lance stopped what he was doing and lowered his hands in shame, "I'm... I'm so sorry."

Keith stayed quiet for a moment, "You have nothing to be sorry for, Lance."

"I beg to differ." Lance tapped Keith's shoulder. "Uh, Can you look at me?"

Keith shifted his gaze to Lance, "Well. I'm looking. Why am I looking exactly?

"So I can clean that sexy gash on your cheek," Lance said, sarcastically.

"Hella sexy," Keith shrugged, "Knock yourself out."

Lance poured some water onto the bloody washcloth and held it up to Keith's cheek, then stopped and chuckled.

"What's so funny, McClain?"

"Nothing, you just have one hell of a Mullet. You know that, right?" Lance said, holding back laughter.

"So what? Don't judge my mullet. My mullet never did anything to you."

"I'm judging the fact that you have a mullet, I'm not judging your mullet."

"You're saying mullet so much that it doesn't even sound like a word anymore."

"Okay. Mullet." Lance chuckled again as Keith rolled his eyes, "What?" Lance asked, "Am I not funny to you?"

"Oh no, you're absolutely hilarious," Keith said sarcastically, which left an awkward silence between the boys. "Uh, that sounded meaner than I intended, didn't it?"

Lance nodded, "Kind of, yeah."

"Um... Sorry. You are pretty funny."

"Thank you, Mullet." Lance smiled, and it even made Keith laugh a bit.

"Is that my name now?"

Lance nodded, "Hell yeah. Now you won't make fun of my bad jokes. Only Katie and Hunk are allowed to do that."

"Fine, you got it."

"Thank you, Sir Mullet." Lance held Keith's face with his right hand and put the towel near his left cheek, "Hold still."

Keith bit his lip and grunted. Lance held the washcloth on Keith's left cheek, causing Keith to yelp and tense up again.

"I'm sorry I can't make this sting any less."

"At least you're doing something." Keith shrugged, still sounding pained, "I can't be upset about that."

"If you say so."

Lance went back to holding the cloth on the skinned cheek in silence. Keith tried not to stare at his face, but it was hard. He kept coming back to Lance's eyes. They really are beautiful eyes. Deep blue with hints of green and teal. _Now I know why people say they could swim in people's eyes._ Keith thought. At least, before realizing how creepy that sounded. But the truth is, and Keith knew, that they didn't really know each other. Lance McClain.

Lance McClain.

What do you think of when you think of Lance McClain?

His eyes? His smell? His humor? His sarcasm? His voice?

What are you supposed to think of when you think of Lance McClain?

Hunk thought of him as his best friend. His brother.

Pidge thought he was a goofball, he made their day brighter, even when he was distracting them from studying.

Allura thought he was hilarious. His faux "lady's man" act was always something that made her smile.

Shiro thought he was kind, but he didn't know as much as he wished he did.

Matt thought Lance was "the coolest mother fucking dude" he's ever known.

And Keith?

Keith loved his eyes. They were the prettiest eyes Keith had ever seen. But was he going to say anything about it?

Hell no.

_This is a sixth grader, Keith. You're IN YOUR TWENTIES, Keith._

Keith cleared his throat, "Well... Thank you."

"It's no problem," Lance replied with a smile. "I think I've done what I can with your scratches, for now, buddy."

The boys stood up and awkwardly stood in front of each other for a few seconds.

"Well..." Keith began, clapping his hands, "Thanks for the help. I'll see you tomorrow." And Keith turned around and began to walk away.

"Wait, Keith!" Lance called.

Keith stopped and turned around, "Yeah, Lancey Lance?"

Lance looked confused, "'Lancey Lance'?"

"If you're gonna call me 'Mullet', I get my own nickname for you."

Lance shrugged, "Okay. Fine by me."

Keith crossed his arms, "So, what is it, Lancey Lance?"

Lance walked over to Keith and held his elbows close to his chest.

"Why were you running and screaming questions to my name?"

Keith's chest suddenly felt tense. He sunk into his shoulders and dug his nails into the sleeves of Lance's jacket.

"I won't judge you, you know. I'm just worried. I mean, a dude who met me _today_ just ran through the neighboorhood at top speed shouting things and shouting my name. Are you okay?"

Keith gripped his arms tighter and shrugged. "I'm not okay, but that's honestly none of your business."

Lance walked closer to Keith, "Do you want me to walk you home?"

Keith just shrugged.

"I won't go with you unless you want me to."

"Why do you want to walk me home? You're not my fucking boyfriend."

_There's the twelve-year-old me I remember. Don't be harsh, Keith.. Please..._

"Can I worry?"

~~_Come on, Keith. Yell. Block him out._ ~~

"Believe it or not, Mullet, I want to help."

~~_Slap him. Yell at him._ ~~

Keith shook his head and looked scared. He didn't even know why he was shaking his head.

~~_Push him. Yell._ ~~

"Do you ever let yourself be helped? Is that why you smoke? Is that why you snapped at me?"

"It's none of your fucking business!"

_Stop yelling, Keith._

"Can I even try? Please?"

"You're crossing some boundaries, McClain."

"You just ran screaming my name! I have the right to be worried!"

_Lance no, step back, don't come close._

"Step back. Don't come closer, Lance."

"Please let me try-"

"STOP!"

And with that, Keith pushed the boy onto the ground. Lance landed with a thud but immediately drew his attention back up to Keith, who was mortified. He looked at his hands that had already healed somehow, and back at Lance.

"I-I.." Keith tried to say, his voice breaking, "I'm so sorry.."

Lance stood up, grabbing his towel and water bottle. Lance walked right up to Keith. They locked eyes for a moment, and once again, Keith stared into his eyes.

_I hurt those eyes._

Lance walked past Keith, who then held out his hand.

"Lance, What are you doing..?"

"You're going to take my hand and I'm going to walk you home."

"But I hurt you-"

"I pushed you past your limit, and I know I'm still pushing them, but let me help? Even if it's just by walking you home?"

Keith stared at his hand in disbelief. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with this kid. Keith pushed him over after he tried to help. Lance _did_ help. And that made Keith uncomfortable. He didn't like help. He might tell Lance why another time.

"You're too nice, McClain."

"And you should tone down the hardass act, Mullet. It's just a short walk while holding hands."

"Dude you sound like the gay one." Keith chuckled.

"Nah I'm-" Lance paused, "Wait for a second.. 'The gay one'?!" a ridiculous looking smile grew on the boy's face and his eyes sparkled, "Are you actually gay?! NEAT!"

Keith has never felt more awkward, "Uh, I guess? I don't fucking know. Why're you so excited?" Keith said, slowly taking Lance's hand.

_You're both innocent twelve-year-olds holding hands. It's fucking friendship goals, Keith. Nothing gay about this._

"I've never had a gay friend before!" Lance said, smiling brightly.

"That's a bit offensive, dude."

"How so?"

"I'm more than just someone's 'gay friend'," Keith exclaimed.

"I know, I'm sorry." Lance apologized, an air of sincerity in his voice. Keith smiled but was unresponsive. Lance and Keith began to walk down the road to Keith's house. _You should see your friends in college, Lance_. Keith thought, _You'll have plenty of gay friends._

The two of them walked in silence for a bit. It didn't seem awkward to either of them until Keith got curious.

"Hey, Lancey Lance?"

"Hm?"

"Well.. uh." Keith began, "Why'd you want to leave the second we stopped talking about the cigarettes?"

Lance just looked at his feet.

"We had a semi-deep talk about my shit. Your turn."

"I don't want to talk about this right now."

"Come on, please? You read my mind so damn easily, I want to know more about you."

The boys stopped walking when they realized they were at Keith's (foster) home. Lance stood in front of Keith and put a hand on his arm.

"I'll tell you another time," Lance said, smiling and lightly squeezing Keith's shoulder.

"Promise?" Keith asked.

"I promise."

"Okay, Lancey Lance." Keith smiled and walked up the stairs to his house. "Until tomorrow?"

"Until tomorrow, Mullet." And after a wave and a smile, Lance ran back down the street to his house. Keith turned towards the front door of his house. After taking a breath, he unlocked the door and walked inside.

 

6:02pm 

The house smelled how he remembered it, but not like anything in particular. Home has a specific smell to everyone that words can't exactly explain, and Keith's was no stranger to him. He kicked his shoes off and threw his backpack on the floor. He began to climb the stairs, taking note of the things that have changed since he was last here. There were not as many paintings, more pictures of his step-sister, and not as much cat hair.

"Hey Keith!" his foster mom, Lilo, called from the kitchen.

"Hey," Keith called from the stairs.

"How was school, buddy?"

"Fine," Keith said. He wanted to be kinder, but he didn't want to fuck with time more than he already had, "I'll be down later."

"Aren't you hungry? I made chicken soup!"

"I'll eat later, I promise." and with that, Keith climbed up the stairs, hearing his step-mom sigh as he left. He felt bad, knowing that before, he'd just skip dinner every night. He didn't let himself eat home-cooked meals because he didn't want to feel let-down if he was given up again. This time he knows that he won't be given up, but he has to be careful since he's scared to fuck with time too much.

As Keith walked into his (old) bedroom, he got possibly the biggest smack of nostalgia humanly possible. In the farthest left-hand corner of his room was his twin bed. The blankets were a dark grey, covered with random splatters of paint. There were multiple pillows, all of them with the same type of navy blue pillowcase; Keith liked to hug his pillows while he slept, it made it easier to fall asleep. There was a small bedside table next to the bed, with a small IKEA lamp/lightbulb contraption, a few glasses of water from the previous nights, and a copy of, "Percy Jackson and The Olympians, The Lightning Thief". Keith read random parts of that book every night for years with no knowledge that new ones were being written and released. Keith took off the two jackets he was wearing and collapsed onto his bed. And he took this time to look at the rest of his room. He had a brown bookshelf on the wall across from his bed, containing a few other books that he had read. But next to that was Keith's desk, where he spent almost all of his time for years. He used to write shitty poems and do homework and all that, but it quickly became a place for him to draw and paint. A slight smile grew on Keith's face as he stood up and sat at his desk. He pulled out his iPod that he received from his previous foster family and opened it to look at his music. All that was there was a few MCR, Panic! At the Disco, and Depeche Mode songs. Which were good songs and all, but Keith was cringing. Hard. _"_ _You're. Not. EDGY."_ he thought. As a matter of fact, a lot of his favorite songs haven't been released yet. He sighed and pressed play on Disenchanted by MCR and began to sketch.

 

7:30pm 

Keith forgot how bad he was at drawing in 7th grade. 

"You're an  _art major_ , Keith." He said out loud. He definitely didn't miss his lack of art skills and lack of proportion from 7th grade. That along with the talking-to-himself issue. He got that under control around freshman year. He leaned back in his chair and looked at his art. It was an eye with a blue butterfly in the reflection. He knew he could easily do it as a 19-year-old, but he just didn't have the skill when he was in 7th grade. He was also short. Very annoyingly short. Keith was only 5'1 in 7th grade, and he's used to being 6'2. He sat back and looked at his drawing. That butterfly is messing with him.  _Or am I going insane?_ He thought. Keith glanced at his little analog clock on the corner of his desk.

Tick, tick; it went.

Time.

Time is a funny concept to Keith. He never gave a thought to the time before 11th grade, when he had to write a poem about how it's affecting people around him. And now it's affecting him more than ever before. "Time is temporary and unimportant, that it only paved roads that lead to heartbreak and destruction. And at a point in time, it will all have been for nothing." That is what he had written, and never regretted writing. But now time seems to be a lot more than what he thought. What if he could bring Lance back from the dead? Is it really possible to bring someone back from the dead? Could it be possible? He turned to look back at the butterfly he drew.

_Keith, please be careful._

Keith blinked and looked around, "What?" he asked himself.

_I said to be careful._

  ** ~~You're messing with time, Keith~~**

Suddenly, Keith's head felt like it was about to explode. He grabbed his head and leaned on his desk. There was a loud ringing. And it was getting louder.

**~~Punching the wall, crying.~~ **

That was what he was doing on this day originally, nine years ago. The ringing was getting louder.

**~~~~~~Lance walked past you on the stairs and you blew smoke in his face.~~ **

**~~You laughed when he coughed and had to take out his inhaler.~~ **

_I'm sorry..._

_You can't change the past, Keith._

_Lance?_

 

 And then Keith remembered something that hasn't happened yet in this timeline.

**~~Lance was at a playground. Alone. Swinging on the swingset. Blood dripping down his nose.~~ **

~~~~_This isn't one of my memories._

  ~~ ** _The boy screamed. Then disappeared._**~~

_You're right._

_It's one of mine._

* * *

 

_~~Is he okay?~~ _

_~~Hunk, I don't know! Focus on Lance!~~ _

_~~Someone wake him up!~~ _

_~~Shiro?~~ _

_~~I said wake him up!~~ _

_~~Keith?~~ _

_~~Get up!~~ _

_~~Keith!~~ _

 

* * *

 

8:00pm

Keith woke up to a knocking on his door. A girl from the other side was saying, "Keith?" after every two knocks. He sat up and looked at the door.

"Come on in." he exclaimed, voice scratchy from just waking up.

After opening the door, Keith's foster sister was standing there with a cup in her hands. She was eight, and Chinese like her other mom, Camille. She had hair down to her shoulders and braided to one side. She was wearing two-piece pajamas with stars on them that she picked out from the boys' section, so they were a little big. The mug must've been hot because she was keeping her sleeves over her hands. Keith chuckled and waved her over, "Hey, Sylvie," he said, stretching, "Did mom send you?"

Sylvie looked confused, "Mom? Which one?" she chuckled.

"I mean either of them." Keith chuckled in return.

"Well, yeah. They both did." Sylvie handed Keith the cup, who nodded and lifted the cup (his weird way of saying 'thank you') in response. It had warm milk in it, and by the smell of it, honey was mixed in. "Are you coming down to eat? Mom's gonna put the soup in the fridge soon."

"Yeah, I will. I'm just gonna take a shower first."

"Okay, I'll tell mom to leave a bowl out for you," Sylvie smiled and turned to walk away, "Also," She gestured to Keith's cheek and nose, "You got a little something there." And with that, she left, shutting the door behind her.

Keith brought his hand up to his right cheek and felt something thick and slightly wet. It wasn't blood, but it wasn't water either. He looked in the mirror and saw a bright ocean-blue splotch of paint on his cheek. He didn't even remember grabbing paint. He considered the fact that Sylvie could've painted on him, but she was still knocking at the door when he woke up. And she also didn't know where his paints were. He shrugged and wiped the splotch off on his arm before leaning back in his chair. He ran his right hand through hair and sighed. With the right hand, Keith pressed the shuffle button on his iPod. He smiled as Wild West by Gregory and The Hawk began to play. It was a song that Sylvie liked to sing, and he never admitted it to her, but he liked it too. It was the type of song he'd listen to if he was staying up late reading his Percy Jackson book for the millionth time. Or if he was lost in thought but wanted a softer song. It was comforting. Keith got up from the chair and collapsed on his bed and shut his eyes. Off in the distance, he could hear Camille and Sylvie humming the song in the background. Camille would sing it to Sylvie sometimes, and although Keith would've never admitted it, he would listen. He would listen as if she was his birth mother. He loved her singing. 

* * *

 

~~_Is he stable?_ ~~

~~_He's okay, just sleeping._ ~~

~~_One wakes up and another is out like a light. Ironic._ ~~

~~_Pidge, not the time._ ~~

~~_Is that..?_ ~~

~~_You don't know him._ ~~

~~_I wouldn't be so sure._ ~~

~~_Sit down, buddy._ ~~

~~_But isn't that..._ ~~

~~_Lance, sit down._ ~~

* * *

 

**October 24th - Three Days before Lance McClain went missing**

 

 

> 12:30pm

The day so far had been as normal as ever. Keith woke up at 7 to walk to school, just like he usually did in 7th grade. He apologized to his foster moms about not eating their soup, and brought a thermos of it with him to try to make up for it. He walked to school with Lance, Hunk, and Katie again. He gave the blueberry jacket back to Lance, who just smiled and told Keith that it was okay. Classes were really easy, but Keith had to pretend to not know it. He didn't want to get too far ahead of himself and fuck over his younger self by skipping grades or classes. At lunch, Keith was sitting with Lance, Matt, Shiro, Katie, and Hunk again. Everything was so _normal_. It was weird to think how this all changed in a few days. Which lead Keith to the question,  _What happened to Lance McClain?_ He knew that Lance ended up in that park. Did someone take him? Was he scared away? It was difficult to understand how someone could just be there one day, then be gone. What if something was going on and he just ran away? He seemed so happy. Keith wished he could go back to the future and ask Hunk about Lance's life leading up to the disappearance. Anything. If his social life had anything to do with it.

 _Give me something. _ Keith thought to himself,  _Anything, world. Help me out here._

"Hey, guys! It's my birthday in a few days!"

There was something. 

Matt smiled, "Yeah, guys. It's Shiro's birthday! We should all hang out." 

"I'll be there," Katie chimed in, "And not just because Matt'll drag me there."

"I'm in too." Hunk smiled. 

There was an awkward pause.

"Wait," Katie said, breaking the silence, "Where is 'there'?" 

"Probably around 3:30 at the park. You know, the one by Katie and Matt's house." Shiro exclaimed.

"Holy shit." Keith said. Out loud.

Everyone turned to look at him.

"Shit- Sorry. I'll be there." Keith forced himself to smile.

 _Then. There. That park._ Keith thought. That park is what he saw. But it would be daytime? Keith remembered it being dark and cloudy.  _What was going to change?_ And then Keith realized Lance hadn't answered yet. Keith turned to him, "Are you gonna come?"

Katie snickered, "That's gay."

It took everyone about three seconds to realize what she meant. Disgusted looks grew on everyone's faces, and Katie burst into hysterical laughter.

"KATIE!" Matt snapped, elbowing her.

"Ow! Okay, okay! I deserved that!"

Lance looked at Katie dead in the eye, "I hate you."

She snickered, "That's fine. You're not the only one."

Lance slowly turned from Katie to the group, "I don't know if I can make it. I'll check though."

"Why not, dude?" Hunk asked.

"Cause," Lance shrugged, "My mom's asshole boyfriend is moving in with us. She wants us all to stay together."

 

_"My theory is that he ran away. I know some shit was happening to him at the time."_

 

"Oh SHIT." 

Everyone turned to Keith. Again.

"Dude," Shiro chuckled awkwardly, "You good?"

"Uh.. yeah. Totally chill. Uhh," Keith studdered, bringing his fingers to his lips, mimicking a cigarette, "With.. draw... Shit.."

Matt gave Keith a pat on the shoulder. A slow and awkward "bro" pat.

"Welp." Katie said, "I guess that'll be a regular thing."

"I guess." Keith studdered again, "Sorry."

"Dude, it's fine." Lance chuckled, "Smile a bit, Mullet."

Keith smiled sarcastically.

"That's not what I meant."

"Yet that's what you're receiving."

"Fine by me," Lance shrugged and smiled, "So are you going to Shiro's?"

"You bet I am."

Keith had to be there. He had to be at that park. He had to find out what happened.

_Don't worry, my Ocean-Eyed Boy. I'll find you. I'll save you._

But Keith only had three days left. 

He was running out of time.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTES: I'm sorry this episode was so short! I've been pretty busy but I'm working on the new chapters every day:) Thank you for reading what I have so far!
> 
> Songs in Order of Appearance<3  
> Disenchanted - My Chemical Romance - https://youtu.be/95hfNjZictY  
> Wild West - Gregory and The Hawk - https://youtu.be/xPijrw8wCds


	3. Clueless - Three Days Left

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2008 Keith finally gets introduced to Allura, he learns more about Lance, and Keith contemplates his next steps for 'saving' Lance McClain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (see end of chapter for more notes) but I'm sorry this took forever! Here's a little more of an easygoing chapter

**October 24th, 2008 - Three Days Before Lance McClain went Missing**

3:24 

“So, you’re turning fourteen, Shiro?”

Keith was now just asking questions. Probably too many questions, but he knew he needed to ask as many as possible. He needed to figure out how to prevent anything from happening, and kind of just figuring out if he even _could_ prevent said 'thing' from happening. He was just questioning Shiro, he didn’t dare go to Lance yet.

_A birthday. That park._

That park is where everything will happen. But why wasn’t anyone else there? Why was it just Lance? Did they leave him behind? Did they play a prank on him? Where did that bloody nose even come from?

His mind was full of questions. But he didn’t know to phrase his questions. He hated his seventh-grade self. He never realized how much he was really capable of until he couldn’t do any of it. It was more difficult to do simple things. He could barely hold a conversation, and he kept on walking around or annoyingly tapping on whatever was closest to him. He brushed all of his problems off as if none of it mattered. He wasn’t diagnosed with anything yet. He took no medication. And his medication might’ve prevented him from possibly fucking things up further. Alas, he had to go on with no meds and no clue how to even talk to people.

"Heh, yeah." Shiro chuckled, "The birthday itself isn't that important, but I just like seeing everyone as a group when we're not all worried about school." he fake coughed and mumbled, "Katie." before he and Keith snickered to themselves.

"I supposed," Keith shrugged, "Do you know if there's any chance we can hang out before then, though?"

"Yeah, probably. Why?"

Keith shrugged again. He mostly wanted to know about Lance, but he sure as shit didn't want Shiro to know that. _Quick, Keith, think of something!_

"Needed some people to study with."

Bingo.

"Wait why studying?" Shiro asked, "You're the only one of us in 7th grade. Lance, Hunk, and Katie are 6th graders. Then Matt and I are 8th graders. I mean, we have a friend in private school who's your age who could probably come by to help you but-"

"Private school? What's his name?"

"You mean _her_ name? It's Allura." Shiro smiled, "Have any of us mentioned her before?"

Keith shook his head. Seventh grade him had no clue, but College Keith did know. It did make perfect sense that she went to a private school. It was an odd experience, though. Allura was friends with everyone when they got into college, but Keith had no clue why. Turned out that Allura and Pidge/Katie had both gone to some summer camp for smart kids and became friends right away. Keith didn't really like Allura when he first met her, her British accent bothered him a lot (it reminded him of a not-so-great foster family of his), but he grew to like her pretty quickly. As a matter of fact, in the first timeline, Keith didn't actually like any of them until halfway through his junior year of high school. That was when he found out for sure that he was being adopted by Lilo and Camille, so he wasn't afraid of making friends. But because of that, he never really knew Lance, and he didn't even know Allura existed until college.

"No, I don't believe you've mentioned her before," Keith said, chuckling at how formal he tried to make himself sound.

"Well, she's great. You might like her." Shiro smiled and cracked his knuckles. (He did that a lot. Keith hated it.)

"I'm sure I would."

"Wait, but dude," Shiro said, lowering his volume, "Are you, like, _gay_?"

Keith suddenly remembered some vital information.

Shiro's parents were hardcore homophobes. They'd had a conversation one time while studying about how freaked out Shiro was about being Bisexual, but never wanting to tell his parents. He forgot how hateful the world still was in 2008. He had no clue how Shiro would feel currently. So Keith did the only logical thing he thought he could do.

"Ye-nope."

_Fuck. Anxiety._

Shiro shook his head, "What?"

"..Uh-"

"Dude, I don't really care. I'm just curious."

Keith just shrugged and took a deep breath.

_It's okay. You're twenty-one, you know how to talk to people. You can talk to people. It's okay._

"I dunno." Keith shrugged. And that wasn't a complete lie. Keith had no clue what his sexuality was in 7th grade. He knew he was gay now, but he might fuck himself over if he came out now before he even thought about being homosexual. And in 2008? Saying that was a possible death wish. He had a good environment at home, but he never really paid attention to how people would react to anything regarding sexuality at school. It made him think for a second about how it might be if Pidge was in his place. If they had to walk around being called "Katie" and "She". _Shit... That would suck._

"Huh, really?"

"Yup." Keith shrugged, "I don't know. I don't really think about that kind of stuff." And that was true.

"Oh, cool." Shiro chuckled.

"What?"

"Sorry, Katie just makes a lot of jokes about you and Lance. I kind of wouldn't be surprised if you did like him."

"Que?"

And along came Lance McClain, as if he was summoned.

"Someone likes me? Who likes me? I heard you speaking. Is it Allura? I bet it's Allura."

Lance talked fast. It made Keith anxious. Which was totally great, since he had no damn anxiety medication on him in this timeline.

_Saying you're anxious isn't that hard._

_Say something._

"Hate to break it to you, dude, but she's not into you like that."

"Damn it."

_Guys, please stop talking._

"So what were you two talking about?"

"Keith was just saying he wanted us all to hang out after school sometime."

"OOOH cool! I can go around and ask everyone!"

_He's so sweet. But he's so loud._

~~_No say nothing._ ~~

~~_He'll hate you if you do._ ~~

_Is it even possible for Lance McClain to hate someone?_

~~_You're annoying anyways, you're lucky people even talk to you._ ~~

"That would be awesome!"

~~_Yell again._ ~~

_Just say something, Keith._

**~~_SAY SOMETHING_ ~~ **

"Shut up!" Keith spat out, smacking his temples with his palms, "God damn it..."

Lance and Shiro got really quiet.

"Be careful," Lance said, quietly, "I don't want you to reopen that gash on your cheek..."

"Dude, are you okay?" Shiro asked after a few more moments of silence.

Keith rubbed his forehead with his hand, "Yeah. I'm okay, sorry guys..." He rubbed his eyes.

Lance put his hand on Keith's shoulder, "Do you need some water?"

Keith nodded, and Lance took his water bottle out of his backpack and handed it to him, "Thank you." Keith said before taking a drink.

"Not a problem." Lance smiled.

 _Such a pretty smile_ , Keith thought. _His eyes sparkle when he smiles. I like his eyes._

"Anywho, " Lance continued, "Want me to ask everyone if they can hang out today?"

"Sure." Shiro nodded, "But it's for studying! So text Allura too!"

"You got it." Lance smiled, whipping out his phone. And it just so happened that at that moment, Pidge-I mean Katie happened to be walking past them, "Hey Pigeon-"

"Why do you call me Pigeon? I hate it when you call me that. And now Matt says it."

"You told me your favorite birds were Pigeons and I'm never letting you live that down."

Katie rolled her eyes, "Fuck you. Now, what did you want to tell me?"

"Can you and Matt hang out after school sometime this week to study? Preferably any time within the next few days?"

Katie's eyes lit up, "Study you say?" she smirked.

 _Funny._ Keith thought. _Even in 6th grade, they have the same smirk. I wonder if Lance'll have the same smile in the future._

~~_If he even has a future._ ~~

Katie thought for a minute before saying, "Maybe." She then turned to Matt, who was just leaving the school building, "HEY DUDE! ANY DAY WE'RE BOTH FREE AT THE SAME TIME!"

Matt ran up to the four of them, "The only day we're all free on the same day is today as far as I know."

"Good." Katie stated, "My study group was canceled anyway. I'll call mom and let her know." Katie pulled out her phone, "And Lance, want me to ask about the weather for you?"

"Yes, please. Thanks, dude." Lance said, "I'll call Allura and Hunk and see if they can hang out today."

"No problemo." Katie snapped with finger guns and a wink. Classic Katie, "And you do that." Lance nodded and ran off to call Hunk and Allura.

Keith turned to Matt, "Why ask about the weather."

Matt shrugged, "Kind of a silly thing, I guess. But Lance is terrified of thunder."

Keith nodded, "Ah." _He has oceans for eyes but he's afraid of thunder? You're a funny boy, Lance McClain._

"Yeah," Matt nodded, "Basically just means that our family gives him a ride home if a storm is predicted

"Cool." Keith nodded again, he didn't really know how to respond.

Lance skipped back over to the group, "Hunk and Allura can meet us at our coffee shop if you guys are up for it."

"Sounds good." Shiro stood up and brushed his jeans off, "It's a bit of a walk, but do you guys want to get going?"

"Heck yeah!" Lance slid down the railing of the stairs, laughing as he did so.

"This kid has too much energy." Keith chuckled as he stood up and began to walk down the stairs.

"You got that right," Katie mumbled.

"Like it's a bad thing!" Lance smiled, skipping in front of the group, then occasionally walking back to join them as they walked to the coffee shop.

The walk to this particular coffee shop was an enjoyable one for Keith. The scenery was always beautiful, and the air always smelled crisp and fresh (at least, he liked to think of it as that). The five of them walked down the sidewalk, past the many shops and stands selling jewelry and fruits and pocket watches; there were all sorts of things along that strip. Lance stopped at every stand to say Hi to the people that ran them. He was such an... Energy? A vibe? An aura? It was hard to describe him. Everyone that Lance talked to smiled and seemed so happy. It was as if he was a ray of sunshine. Maybe even an angel. Do angels exist? Keith thought. And he decided that if they did, Lance would be one.

And this angel was wearing his blueberry coat. That damn coat was the best and worst thing about him. It just added to the weird vibe that Lance gave off. It made Keith extremely drawn to him.

_You were red, and you liked me because I was blue._

_I hate that song._

_Is that not true, though?_

_I don't know._

*click!*

* * *

 

_Will he wake up?_

~~_We don't know._ ~~

~~_Come on, buddy._ ~~

~~_Pidge, that won't help._ ~~

~~_Lance, lay down. You need to rest._ ~~

_I swear I know him..._

~~_Why are you standing up? We said sit down!_ ~~

_But will he be okay?!_

~~_We don't know!_ ~~

* * *

*click!*

Keith blinked and there was a flash in his eyes. He kept blinking them, "What the hell?"

Katie moved her hands away from his eyes. In her hands was a massive Polaroid camera. She had reached over Keith's shoulder to take a damn photo, and nearly blinded him in the process. Keith rubbed his eyes as Katie took the photo from the camera and quickly put it into a small book she had, likely so it could develop.

"Sorry, bro." She said, putting the book and the camera in her backpack, "There was a sick butterfly on your shoulder-- Oh shit."

"Wait, a butterfly?!" Keith looked over his left shoulder to see nothing there. But when he looked up to say something to Katie, she immediately put a finger up to shush him. Everyone was dead silent, except Katie, slowly pulling her camera back out. Keith turned to his left, where everyone was staring, and there was Lance.

Lance, with a big blue butterfly that had landed right on his nose.

"Don't. Move." Katie hissed as quietly as possible as she raised her camera viewfinder to her eye.

There was so much blue in one place. A blueberry jacket, an ocean-eyed boy, and now a big blue butterfly. It was so much, almost too much. Yet all perfect. _How are you so perfect, Lance McClain?_

*click!*

With the flash of the camera, the butterfly flew away to who-knows-where. Lance was giggling. A dude. In sixth grade. In 2008. Giggling. It was so... perfect.

Katie put the other photo in the book, and finally put the book and camera away.

Keith turned to Lance and smiled, "That was adorable, you know that?"

A squeal came from Katie, who was smiling. It wasn’t the most pleasant smile though. It’s the type of smile you’d get if your two favorite characters in a book just kissed. There was no teeth, just wide, stretched lips

“What?” Lance turned to her.

Katie looked extremely happy, but still in the weird, fangirly way, “Nooothinnn’!”

Keith rolled his eyes, “Katie, _why_?”

“Why not?”

Matt put his hand on her shoulder, “Okay, Pidgeon, leave ‘em alone.”

Katie copied Keith’s shrug, crossing her arms. And at that moment, Shiro snapped his fingers, catching everyone’s attention, “Guys, we’re here.”

Everyone, one-by-one, entered the coffee shop.

 

4:10pm 

Elle’s Coffee and More wasn’t your average coffee shop. Elle’s was cozy, with warm lighting, and a very ‘Home-y’ atmosphere. There was a stage area, for when guests would play live music. There were normal tables and chairs, but there were also a few couches, with blankets and fluffy pillows and a fireplace. Elle’s cat would walk around the shop also, the cat’s name was Haruhi. Haruhi was a fat white Siberian cat. She loved to cuddle whoever was sitting on the couch, and she just, in general, said hello to everyone who ever came into the shop. Keith always acted smug about being the only one who could say her name correctly (besides Shiro). Everyone else just called her Spring, due to her name being “Spring Day” in Japanese.

Elle’s also was more than just coffee. There were amazing coffee drinks for sure, but Keith’s favorite thing to get was the boba tea. Their tea was some of the best that Keith had ever had. Elle’s was the place that Keith missed the most when Keith (and friends) went to college.

Everyone got in line. From front to back, it went Katie, Shiro, Matt, Lance, and Keith. Keith remembered the first time he came here with his friends, he had no idea what to do or what to get, so Hunk ordered his for him. Not wanting to mess up time, Keith looked around for Hunk. He saw him on one of the couches with (who he was guessing was) Allura. He looked busy, so Keith just stayed in line.

 _“Frick,_ ” Keith thought. He sighed and tapped Lance on the shoulder.

He spun around, “Waddup, my guy?”

Keith chuckled, “Uh, never been here before. Any suggestions?” Keith knew exactly what he wanted. He loved The Thai tea. He used to always get extra boba with his too.

Lance thought for a minute or so, and the line was getting shorter, Matt was in the middle of his order. “How about this,” He smirked, “You give me $3.25, and trust me to get you something good.”

“This sounds like a bad deal.”

“Come on, what have you got to lose?” Lance smiled. _That smile._ “Thanks, dude, you won’t regret it!” Lance smiled before spinning back around.

Keith shook his head, “What,” He said to himself, quietly. He looked down at hands and saw his wallet. Which was missing $4.00.

_Damn it._

Keith didn’t hear what Lance ordered in that thought process, but he realized that it happened when Lance took Keith’s shoulders and moved them both out of the line. He took Keith’s Hand in his and dropped three quarters in his hand.

“Gee thanks,” Keith chuckled, “You better not have poisoned me.”

“Just trust me on this,” Lance smiled, taking Keith’s hand up to his mouth and bowing, “M’lady.”

_Is he gonna kiss my hand?_

_Did he call me a girl?_

_Is he going to KISS MY HAND?_

Keith glared, “You motherfucker.”

“What can I say?” Lance shrugged, letting go of Keith’s hand (damnit),“I aim to please and annoy.”

“I can tell.”

They both smiled. Lance’s eyes continued to sparkle.

“You annoy me in a good way.”

Smiling.

“I know, mullet.” Lance winked.

_He winked._

_He fucking WINKED._

Keith knew his face was red. He tried to brush it off by pretending to just be hot, “Hold this for me please.” Keith tossed his backpack at Lance, who caught it (with a rather surprised look on his face). Keith took off his coat and his red flannel. He walked over to a coat rack and hung up his black coat. Walking back to Lance, he tied his flannel around his waist.

“You a hipster now, Mullet?” Lance laughed, taking off Keith’s beanie and ruffling his hair.

Now, normally Keith would hate it when people messed with his hair, but he didn’t mind this time. As a matter of fact, he enjoyed it.

“If you want to call it that, Lancey Lance.” Keith smiled, taking his beanie back from Lance. He looked at it for a second, then up at Lance’s smiling face. Keith smirked, and Lance looked confused.

“What?”

Keith, still smirking, brought the beanie up to Lance’s head and placed it on him. He messed with Lance’s hair a bit, but he barely needed anything adjusted. Keith stepped back and smiled.

_Damn._

_You are hot._

_Cute?_

_Hot?_

Hot.

“Neat.”

_What the fuck._

_Neat? Who says ‘neat’!?_

“Lance!”

The two boys turned their heads, and there was the Barista (who wasn’t Elle, but was Rachel, her niece).

“That’s our stuff, come on!” Lance exclaimed as he and Keith walked over to the counter. But instead of stopping for the drinks, Lance went behind the counter and gave Rachel a hug.

_This kid really knows everyone, doesn’t he?_

“How was your day?”

“It was good today!”

“If you still need help with your math, let me know.”

“I will.”

The two exchanged a long and fast-paced conversation, which made Keith uneasy. He had never met anyone as chatty as Lance. He stepped back; away from the conversation. Slow steps back. Until...

 _Oh shit_.

“KEITH!”

Keith Kogane had tripped over the cat. At least, nearly.

_Why haven’t I hit the floor yet?_

He opened his eyes (which were closed due the the compulsory need to shut his eyes as or if he fell), and looked at his hands. And he smiled.

_What a nerd._

There was Lance, who had grabbed his hands and held him up. Standing behind him was Hunk, who had grabbed the poor cat. Keith was in shock, and just kept staring at Lance, whose eyes were huge (also with shock). Keith smiled and looked at his eyes.

_Beautiful..._

“Why’re you smiling like that?” Hunk chimed, confused.

Keith chuckled before properly standing up again, “The shock,” he shrugged, still smiling, “Thanks-” Keith put his hand on Lance’s shoulder and winked, “My dude.”

_Who the fuck says that._

Then Keith did finger guns.

_WHY DID I DO FINGER GUNS!_

_Fuckin’ twelve-year-olds..._

Lance chuckled, “No problem, my guy.” He said, adding in the wink and finger guns, somehow looking a lot cooler than Keith. That was something he was starting to hate; Lance somehow made everything look cooler than Keith, at least in Keith’s opinion. Keith shook his head and walked towards Hunk, then looked at Haruhi. The cat was much smaller currently than Keith last remembered. She was just a kitten.

“Hey, Ha-”

_Shit! No names!_

Keith coughed, “Sorry, hey kitten.” Keith smiled and held out his hand. The kitten sniffed his hand, then ran her head against it. Keith grinned, “Sweet baby.” He looked at Rachel, “What’s her-THEIR name?”

Rachel looked confused, then laughed, “I actually don’t think Elle named her yet.” She put her hands on her hips and grinned, “You two have any ideas?”

Keith thought to himself for a bit. _Do I say anything? Would I change anything again if I did say something?_

“How about Haruhi!”

Keith glanced over to a beaming Lance. _Did he name her?_ Keith smiled at Lance, “I agree with Lancey Lance over here.”

Hunk put the cat down and raised his eyebrow, “Lancey Lance?”

“What?” Keith shrugged, “What’s so wrong with that nickname?”

“Woah woah, nothing!” Hunk shook his head, “Just funny, is all.”

“I suppose.”

“HEY, LOVEBIRDS!”

The three turned their attention to Matt, who was sitting on the couch closest to the fireplace, “Grab your stuff and get over here!”

Keith and Lance turned bright red, while Hunk and Rachel just began to laugh. Lance glared at those two, before grabbing Keith’s wrist and dragging him to the couch area where their friends were.

There was Shiro, Katie (who was suspiciously putting her camera and picture book away), and Matt. Matt happened to be staring at his watch.

“Dude, what’re you-” Lance started to say,

“HUMPHSHHHHHHHH!” Matt shushed Lance, who put up his hands as he sat down on the carpeted floor (and Keith followed by sitting next to him), “Four… three… two..” Matt whispered before jumping up and onto the couch.

“The fuck-” Shiro began, nearly spilling his iced tea.

“FOOOUUUUUUUR TWEENTYYYYYYY!” Matt announced to the coffee shop, followed by sighs across the entire cafe, “PEW PEW PEW PEW! BWAHM BWAHM BWAHM BWAHM!”

“Shut up, you’re embarrassing the Holts.” Katie pulled him down, nearly spilling her matcha hot chocolate in the process, “Shit-”

Matt gave her a slight shoulder shove, “Live a little, Pigeon.”

“If I was a real pigeon, I would flip flap away from you as quickly as possible.”

“Nope. You love me.”

Katie flipped him off.

“Okay. Rude.”

As soon as Matt said that, someone pulled up a chair and began to laugh. She had long curly hair that was dyed grey, and had a british accent.

Keith smiled, _Hey old friend._

“Okay, Allura..” Katie waved and sat criss-cross on the couch, facing her brother but turning her head to each person, “Did you see the 4:20 stunt that Matt just pulled?”

“I did.” She nodded.

“Okay, if you were hypothetically a pigeon, would you fly away from Matt if he did that.”

“Without a doubt, yes.” Allura nodded, high-fiving Katie in the process.

She was the same as everyone else to Keith. Herself, just younger. Her hair was a bit shorter (her shoulders instead of the middle of her back), she had more freckles, and she wore more “Peter Pan” collared shirts. She looked over to Keith and smiled, “I don’t believe we’ve met,” She held out her hand, “I’m Allura.”

Keith took her hand and shook it, “Keith.”

“A pleasure.” She said, smiling. Then she turned to Lance and gave him the biggest hug.

“Woah!” Lance smiled before hugging her back, “Hey you!”

“Hey you, yourself.” She smiled before sitting up, then in between Keith and Lance.

_How dare you. I want to sit next to him._

At that moment, Hunk sat on the empty space on the couch, arms filled with drinks. “Seriously, you guys?” Hunk said as he began to hand Shiro his coffee, “Uncool.”

Katie looked at Shiro’s black coffee (with whipped cream), eyes clearly judging him. He looked around and shrugged, “What?”

“Why are you drinking coffee? You’re in middle school.” Katie asked as she sipped her hot chocolate.

“Okay,” Shiro put his mug on a nearby coffee table, “I’m in some really hard classes this year, cut me some slack.” Katie shrugged and kept sipping her hot chocolate.

“Don’t judge him, everyone has their own tastes.” Hunk chimed, handing Lance and Keith two identical-looking cups of boba tea, with the big straws (Keith’s was blue, and Lance’s was red). Keith looked at the liquid suspiciously, knowing it wasn’t what he normally gets. Lance ripped off the packaging for the straw and stabbed the plastic wrap covering the tea, and immediately began to gulp down the drink. Keith looked from his tea to Lance, then back again. Lance looked up at him and took his mouth away from the straw, “Come on, try it?”

“You’re making it look extremely unappetizing.” Keith said. But he was lying. He just wanted an excuse to keep looking at Lance.

“Come on, pleeease?” Lance asked, giving Keith puppy eyes, “You won’t regret it.”

Keith stuck the straw in his tea and slowly brought it up to his mouth, “Promise this isn’t drugs?”

“Not _drugs_. But to me, it’s the best drug there is.”

Keith glared for a moment, but then finally took a sip of this tea.

And damn.

_Damn._

This tea was GOOD. Really good.

 _“_ Holy shit.”

“Right?” Lance then stood up and walked over to Keith and gave him a hug.

 _THIS MOTHERFUCKER GOT A_ _HUG_ _!_

 _IN FRONT OF_ _EVERYONE’S_ _SALAD!_

_..._

_That's not that funny now, is it?_

“I told you. Nerd.” Lance smiled.

Keith smiled back, “Loser.”

“Okay.. guys.” everyone looked up to Hunk, who had caught everyone’s attention, “This is cool and all, but I’m actually failing History. Can we please start the actual studying now?”

“I second Hunk.” Matt commented.

“Me too.”

“Me three.”

Lance sighed, “But I hate studying!”  
“Okay,” Katie snickered, “Then help Keith. He’s the one who wanted to hang out anyways.”

Lance looked at Keith, then at his backpack, “May I?”

Keith gestured to it, “If you so wish.”

Everyone took out their homework, and so the studying began.

 

7:30pm 

 

Keith, laying in his bed, stared at his ceiling. The “studying” went a little all over the place. He ended helping Lance with _his_ math instead of vice-versa. One of the perks of being twenty-ish. Keith found out that Lance got him Rose boba tea. Rose of all things. Lance also ordered them with strawberry chunks, which made it perfect (in Lance’s opinion). Keith wanted to drink it slowly. He wanted to savor every drop of that damn tea. He thought about all of his ‘data’ on Lance so far.

-He had some family shit going on

-He was a middle(?) sibling

-He’s scared of thunder

-He went missing in a park

-He was in a coma when he woke up

There had to be something he was missing. Something still felt off. Keith looked to his left at the light rain that was pitter-pattering against his window. _How creepy can you get?_ Keith asked himself. _A list? You made a fucking list?_ Keith closed his eyes and sighed, running his fingers through his hair. Today was a good day. A great day. It was way too great. What could he do? As Keith began to drift off, he made a few final thoughts.

There was a bigger piece of the puzzle missing and Keith knew it. But how could he fix what was happening?

Would he be able to fix what would happen?

* * *

 

_Thank you._

_For everything._

* * *

 

**OCTOBER 25th 2008 - Two days before Lance McClain was reported missing**

3:45am 

Keith woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. He was still in his school clothes (still wearing his shoes), his mouth tasted gross from not brushing his teeth, and he could feel how gross he was via his hair and face due to no shower. He was a mess.

_Who the fuck is calling me this early on a Saturday?_

Keith pressed the answer button and put it next to his face of the bed, “Who the fuck is calling me at late-o’clock?”

“Me.”

_Lance?_

Keith sat up, a lot more awake now, “Lance? The fuck are you-”

“Did I wake you up?”

Keith grabbed the closest drink near him and splashed himself in the face. _Sleep? Don’t know her._

“Nope, I was awake.” _Smooth._ “Are you okay?”

“No, look outside.”

Keith got up and ran to the window, and there was Lance. Standing outside in his blue coat with tear-stained cheeks.

“The fuck…” Keith said to himself before raising his phone back up to his ear again, “Stay there.”

Keith slid down the stair-railing and snuck out of his front door as quietly as he could. And outside was Lance. His clothes were wet from the rain, his hair was sticking to his face, and his eyes were puffy from crying.

“I’m sorry I woke you up..” He said, choking from trying to stop crying, “ I just didn’t know where to go and you live the closest and I didn’t think anyone else would be awake-”

“Hey, hey, woah,” Keith put his hands on Lance’s shoulders, “It’s okay. What happened?” _Your eyes are oceans, not waterfalls._

“I.. I don’t.. Know-”  
And that’s when the rain started pouring down harder and the wind got stronger. Lance yelped and hugged Keith, burying his face in Keith’s jacket/flannel.

_Is there supposed to be a thunderstorm tonight?_

“We should go inside-”

“NO!” Lance gasped, eyes wide, “I can’t go into any houses, I don’t want any parents to know-”

“They won’t care-”

“Keith please!” he cried, “No houses! I don’t want to go home, I don’t want to be caught, I don’t want to be…” Lance stopped to catch his breath and keep sobbing. And that’s when Keith saw it, I massive cut on the top of his head, he was bleeding and running down onto his neck, onto his coat; everything...

Keith thought to himself for a moment.

_Shit._

~~_You’ve had way better ideas._ ~~

_I know._

~~_You could be smarter about this. That’s a terrible idea._ ~~

_Perfect. My specialty._

“Follow me.” Keith said, taking Lance’s hand and immediately starting to walk down the street.

“No!” Lance cried again, “I can’t go home… Please!”

Keith and Lance stood apart, facing each other.

“We’re not going home.”

Lance sniffed, “Huh?”

“Just follow me, okay?”

Lance crossed his arms and gave himself a hug, “No,” he said, “I’m not following. I’m going with you, but help me…”

Keith sighed and faced him, wind blowing rain and his hair into his eyes, “How do I help you?” he asked, holding out his hand, “Please. I want to know.”

Lance looked at his hand for a moment, then back at Keith's eyes.

"Just... Please, talk to me?"

A moment of silence past by the two boys. Until finally, Lance began to slowly walk over to Keith. After wiping his tears off of his cheeks, Lance walked under Keith’s arm, and stood next to him. He slowly reached for Keith’s hand and pulled it around him.

He just needs to be held.

_He just needs to be held._

Keith smiled and hugged him tighter, “I know somewhere we can go. Do you trust me?”

Lance nodded, “Yeah. Is that bad?”

“Possibly.” Keith chuckled, “Come with me.”

As they both walked down the street, Keith thought to himself…

_Why do I want to call him ‘Love’?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter lowkey sucks. I'll have a lot more important things in the next chapter, though! I do apologize for the long amount of time this is taking me to write all of these, High school is emotionally and physically draining (and I'm in honors for most of my classes. Help). Anyways, thank you so much!


	4. Fear - Two Days Left.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance and Keith have some deep talks, and all is well. Or is it?

**October 25th, 2008 - Two days Before Lance McClain was reported missing**

4:00am

 

It was possibly the worst idea Keith had ever had to come to this park. Yet what did he do?

He brought Lance to the damn park.

They sat under the slide that was connected to the playground. This used to be a place where he’d come to smoke when he was younger. The rain was pouring around them, and Keith kept his own jacket wrapped around Lance. He didn’t feel cold, though. He just held onto Lance.

_I can’t let go of him._

He was sobbing into Keith’s chest. Does he ask what happened? Does he wait for Lance to spill his guts out? What do you do in this situation?

“I’m sorry,” Lance coughed into Keith’s flannel, “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry-”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” Keith moved his hand up to Lance’s head and pulled him a little closer. He took a deep breath and tightened his grip on Lance a little tighter. Now, Keith was never a big touch-y feel-y person. And currently, all he wanted to do was hold this boy. He looked down at Lance’s head and at the cut. It had stopped bleeding, but it had still stained the scalp and hair around it. Keith had an urge to kiss it, as if it would somehow make it go away. As if a kiss on the head could make his boy feel better.

~~_He's not yours. He's not_ _your_ _boy._ ~~

Keith knew that. He did. But he couldn't make the urge go away, even if he wanted it to. So he just sighed and twirled Lance's hair in his fingers as gently as he could.

"Dude, it's okay." Keith whispered to him, thinking that "dude" probably wasn't the best word to use in that situation. He wanted to cry. He knew whatever was going on wasn't okay. In two days, he knew Lance would disappear, and he watched him _die_. How are you supposed to feel about something like that?

"Is it?" Lance sat up, not bothering to wipe his tears, "Is it okay? Does it seem like I'm okay?"

_No._

"You put on a good act at school."

_Proper grammar? Who knows._

Lance chuckled and leaned against Keith's shoulder (who put his arm around Lance), "I try."

Keith let out a fake laugh, an uncomfortable one, "I know," he sighed, "Lance, what happened?"

Lance was silent for a while after that. He just hugged Keith tighter. Which Keith didn't mind, he just wanted to know. He felt like he needed to know.

"Please.." Keith mumbled, "Please tell me."

Lance sighed, "Tell you what?"

"Why your head was bleeding? Why you were just crying in my arms?" Keith asked. Lance took a shaky breath and sat up.

"Mom has a boyfriend," Lance shrugged, "And let's just say he's not the biggest fan of me."

"Why not? Who wouldn't be a fan of you?"

_Shit I said that second part out loud._

Lance chuckled, "He doesn't like how I talk back." Keith kept his mouth shut, he talked back all of the time, this just wasn't the time or place to say that, "I don't like how he treats my mom, I don't like how he treats my sister, I don't like how he thinks of certain people... He's just... He's not a good guy."

Keith shook his head, "Then how did you..." he gestured to the cut on Lance's head.

"What? This ol' thing?" Lance chuckled, wiping his tears on his sleeve, "I was scared, I ran into my bathroom, and I slipped. Soap dish fell on my head." He mouthed the word 'Boom' while making an exploding gesture with his hands.

"But why-"

"I really don't want to talk about the rest..." Lance rested on Keith's lap and looked up at him, "I'm sorry."

Keith shrugged, "I'm worried, but stay as silent as you want to." Keith ran his fingers through Lance's hair again, "It's okay, I don't judge."

Lance chuckled, and they smiled at each other.

"Hey, Keith?"

"Hmm?"

Lance smiled, "You're sweet, you know that?"

His eyes are glassy, full of color, full of life. How could he look so perfect? But he wasn't perfect, and Keith knew that. He was so perfectly imperfect. The kind of boy who people write about, wishing they were real. He was right here, laying on Keith's lap. And his name was Lance.

_Lance._

He just wanted Lance here forever, laying on his lap, in his arms. This was where he knew Lance was safe.

_Just stay with me. I don’t want you to get hurt._

Keith smiled.

He wanted to kiss Lance. He knew he wanted to kiss Lance.

What the fuck do you do in this situation? Keith’s twenty-one. Well, currently twelve, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s in his early twenties. Lance is eleven or twelve.  
Technically, they’re the same age, but that doesn’t change anything currently. He doesn’t know how Lance feels. He could never know how Lance feels.

Do you kiss a boy you just met? Is that how this works.

Keith just wanted to hold him. He wanted to hold him and cuddle him and keep him in his arms, where he knew Lance would be safe. Could he keep him safe?

_Kiss him._

Keith shook his head, “Sorry... What did you say?”

Lance smiled, “ I said you’re sweet,” he hugged Keith tighter, “Thank you for being here.”

“Why are you-”

“Shut up,” Lance loosened his grip but kept his arms around Keith, “I needed you tonight, thank you.”

Keith smiled back, “It’s no problem,” thinking he sounded too nice, Keith added, “Nerd.”

“Loser.”

The rain was light and the sun was beginning to shine from the slivers between the clouds and the hills. The air was crisp, but not too cold. Lance’s face looked soft. He looked gentle. He looked pure and soft and sweet. Their breath could be seen as they breathed out. Keith sighed, pushing Lance’s hair out of his face.

“You’re the sweet one, Lancey Lance.” Keith smiled.

He pulled Lance closer to him and he kissed the cut on his head.

_No._

He thought.

_Not yet._

 

6:30am 

Lance had been asleep on Keith’s lap for a while now. Keith was wide awake, slowly tracing his finger into circles along Lance’s back with one hand, and using the other to run his fingers through his hair. It seemed to keep Lance asleep. The boy’s breath could still be seen as it wove its way into the air. The wanting to kiss him was still there, but Keith just held him.  

“Lance,” Keith sighed, aware that he was only talking to himself, “Don’t go anywhere, please?”

Lance just kept his steady breathing, still sleeping. Keith had noticed all of his freckles, how one of his ears was slightly bigger than the other, how chubby his cheeks are, and how long his eyelashes are. That and more; all little things. Keith had a poem written in his mind for him, and he figured he’d write it later.

Sighing (and being careful not to wake up Lance), Keith took his phone out of his jacket pocket and attempted to text.

_Jesus christ.…_

_Blackberry can go to hell._

_iPhone where are you when I need you?_

Keith gave up on texting and instead pulled up Hunk’s number and pressed ‘Call’.

It rang once.

And twice

“Keith?”

_Bingo._

“It’s a Saturday… There’s no free breakfast at my house today-”

“No, no. Dude, not that.” Keith looked down, “I got a bit of a situation with Lance, who’s… uh.” Keith put his hand on Lance’s head, “Currently asleep on my lap in the middle of the park.”

Keith could hear the rustling of sheets through the phone (Hunk was probably sitting up), “Okay, I’m awake. So… Wait, what?”

“Uh…” Keith hadn’t exactly thought any of this plan through, he wanted to know more, he wanted to get to know more.

~~**_Maybe you should try to want to know them instead of trying to analyze their every move._ ** ~~

_I just want to know how to help._

~~**_Analyzing and using people for more information isn’t the same as just “wanting to help”._ ** ~~

“Can I just.. Bring him to you? Or… Something? We're at the park and it's raining and-”

“Keith, you’re making zero sense.”

“Can you help me out is what I’m asking?”

Hunk sighed over the phone, “You’re killing me, dude. I’ll text you my address, bring him over?”

“You got it. Thank you.”

“You owe me over for waking me up this early.”

“Noted, I owe you.”

“Okay.”

_Beep_

And the call ended.

Keith lowered the phone and put it back in his pocket, and looked down at Lance.

“Shit, dude..” Keith sighed and knelt next to him. He put one of Lance’s arms around his shoulders, and he moved his right arm under Lance’s legs. Sighing, he thought for a moment, “Do I carry you and wake you up, or let you sleep?”

After contemplating, it was too late. Keith's phone died. Keith realized he actually didn’t know where Hunk lives in this timeline. At least, he shouldn’t know yet. 

_I guess this means I can let you sleep for awhile, I can just say my phone died before seeing your address. Or something._

Keith took his arms away and just let Lance lay there. Keith sat there for a few minutes, just stroking Lance’s hair until everything faded out, and before Keith knew it, he was fast asleep.

* * *

 

_I want you to know that you-_

_I what?_

_Wait..._

_Don't go...Please!-_

* * *

 

10:23am 

*click!*

"Phwhat the hell?!" Keith sat up, instantly knocking his head against the side of the play structure, "FUCK-"

Laughter. 

_Who the fuck is laughing?!_

Pidge.

_I mean..._

Katie. That motherfucker.

Katie. And Hunk. And Matt. And Shiro. And Lance.

"You all suck."

"Sorry, dude!" Gasped Lance, who was laughing the hardest, "There just *laugh* was a fucking BUTTERFLY just chilling on your face!"

He was obviously avoiding what happened earlier that morning.

"Mood." Came from Matt, who was visibly more tired than everybody else.

_A butterfly?_

Keith sat up all the way, "Was it a damn blue butterfly again?"

Katie lifted her polaroid camera up and took the piece of film out from the mouthpiece, "Yup, you'll see the beautiful picture of it in an hour or so," She put the film in her wallet and the camera in a side-bag-thing that she was carrying around, "Blue things just seem to like you, dude."

Keith shrugged, "I guess so," he looked at all the people, then at Shiro, who had a big dumb grin on his face from laughing, "Dude come on, I'd think you'd have them stop the laughing."

"Hey," Shiro exclaimed, " _You_ had a butterfly on your face, which you obviously needed saving from. So, they had to have the Dad of the group-" He gestured to himself and Matt slapped his shoulder, playfully, "They had to come help you. SO! They saved your life from the terrifying Butterfly. Kid tested, parent approved" Shiro did a big ol' thumbs up.

_Fucker._

Keith stood up to join them outside, as it had finally stopped raining, "You know, I thought I'd have someone on my side here."

Hunk shrugged, "Well  _someone_ didn't show up at my house when I was expecting him. So don't blame me."

Keith rolled his eyes, "I'm sorry, okay? My phone died"

"Oooooohhhh," Hunk nodded, "Makes sense. You didn't have my address. It's okay."

_Thank god I got some sleep._

"What are you all doing here?" Keith asked.

"Hunk called Matt and Shiro to try and track you down," ~~Pidge~~ Katie exclaimed, happily, "And I heard Matt sneak out so I followed him."

"Yeah," Matt added, "And Lance just happened to be here with you. He was awake though."

"I woke up and went on the swings." Lance smiled.

 _Good._ Keith smiled.  _Lance is smiling. Thank god._

"Do you guys want to get hot chocolate?" Katie yawned, "I need a pick-me-up."

"Sounds good," Shiro announced (who seemed to be leading the group at the moment), "I'll buy, I just got paid for yard work."

"YES!" Katie cheered.

Hunk looked excited, "Sounds good!" 

"Sounds great!" Keith and Lance said at the same time, causing them both to smile.

 _This is going to be a good day._ Keith thought.  _God, I hope so._

* * *

4:00pm

This day was going too well. A Hot Chocolate (plus fucking Shiro with his coffee) hangout, then they all went back to the park to play. Hunk's sister had brought a picnic basket for them, and they were all just playing around on a patch of grass next to the playground. Lance put his phone in a bowl and was using it to play music (and make it louder). Matt had chosen "A Little Less Sixteen Candles and a Little More "Touch Me". One of Keith's favorites, because he is emo. Or, at least  _was._

_"I confess, I messed up. Dropping 'I'm sorry'..."_

Keith lay on the patch of grass, on a blanket that Hunk's sister brought. Katie sat next to him editing a screenplay that  ~~they-~~ she had written earlier that week. It was about a girl liking girls, which she was doing for a class film project. Keith didn't know how that would fly in a middle school in 2008, but he wasn't going to say anything. He knew he was gay at this time in his life.

Speaking of...

Lance and Matt were singing along to the song. Matt was harmonizing with Lance, who was caught up in the old songs.

"You're just the girl all the boys want to dance with-" Lance sang,

"AND I'M JUST THE BOY WHO'S HAD TOO MANY CHANCES!" Lance and Matt belted at the top of their lungs.

_"I'm sleeping on your folk's porch again, dreaming-"_

_You sure were, McClain. You sure were._ Keith closed his eyes. Just thinking about the ocean-eyed boy.

Brown hair, soft, a little curly, easy to twirl between fingers.

Freckles scattered along the face, each one in a perfect spot, Keith thought of them as constellations.

Taller than Keith, way taller than most people in his grade. Keeping a good 6'2.  _How the fuck does that happen in 7th grade?!_

Blue eyes. Perfect...  _Perfect_ blue eyes.

_Why don't you tell me that?_

Keith opened his eyes and turned his head. A blue butterfly had landed on the bowl the cellphone was placed in. 

_You're just gonna chill there?_

_Yup._

_Got a problem with that?_

_Not particularly._

Keith opened his eyes, he sighed.

_Why are you here._

_You know why I'm here._

_But... I don't-_

_Don't stay at the party._

_What?_

_Lance._

_Shiro's birthday. Don't stay._

_What... Oh fuck._

The birthday party.

_Oh FUCK._

"Keith!" Lance yelped.

"No!" Keith yelled, and the butterfly flapped away.

"What the hell was- WHAAAGH!"

And Lance landed on Keith's stomach. The dumbass tripped on the bowl and now the butterfly was nowhere to be found.

_Well... This is awkward._

"Sorry dude." Lance got up and kept dancing with Matt, just forgetting that the trip ever happening.

_Lance, you dick._

"You can make all the moves, you can aim all the spotlight. Get all the sighs and the mo-oans just right."

Matt sang the first part, and Lance hit a sick riff with the second line. Keith wondered if they even knew what the song was about yet. Keith sure knew, he used to listen to this all of the time. Shiro and Matt probably knew. Keith hoped with all of his heart that Hunk didn't know yet. Katie probably knew, she was smart (and kinky) enough. Who knew about Lance, Keith could mostly just guess with this mystery kid.

_Lance and Keith... Mystery kids!_

Or...

_Keith and Lance, Mystery kids!_

Keith and Lance?

Lance and Keith?

...

Keith and Lance.

_Keith and Lance._

What a nice thought that was.

What if he grew up knowing this kid?

* * *

_Like this?_

* * *

 

"Keith come on, wake up!"

Lance... 

There were beeps on a hospital monitor.

_Where am I?_

"Keith?"

He opened his eyes, there he was, standing up.

Messy brown hair, those freckles. Those... eyes?

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

"What's happening?"

_Beep. Beep._

Then.

**It all went dark.**

* * *

_"Keith?_

_"KEITH!"_

* * *

 6:30pm

Keith woke up in his bed, at his house. His head was pounding, but he sat up. He noticed there was a note taped to his chest.

_To Keith/His Foster Family,_

_Keith was with us all day, he passed out around 4ish, he must've been really tired. Please don't get mad at him, we all wanted to hang out. We hope we didn't cause any inconveniences, we appreciate having him around. Sorry about kinda stealing him for a bit._

_To Keith, call us if you want to hang out anytime. Your a cool dude._

_Thank you, Shiro, Lance, Hunk, Katie, and Matthew._

It was a sweet note, other than the incorrect use of the word "your". But Keith looked over it. Maybe if he looked over any imperfections, he could pretend this was less important than it was.

Keith glanced over at his phone, which was sitting, charging, on his nightstand. Balanced on top of a couple glasses of water that he'd been too lazy to take to the sink. He picked it up and rolled over on his side to look at an unknown number

xxx-362-8964

hey man! its lance, text shiro when you wake up so we know ur not dead lol. 

Keith chuckled.

Keith

I'm up. I'm not dead.

Keith waited a couple minutes after adding Lance to his official contact list, and no response, so he picked up his phone again.

Keith

You okay?

Time for the waiting game.

Thinking again. Keith grabbed a notebook and started sketching and planning. Along the edges, he wrote notes.

_Shiro's birthday, get there early? Don't stay too long._

_Lance had a bloody nose on a swing set then was gone._

_Go to party early?_

_Hang out with Lance before?_

_Hang out with Shiro first?_

_7th grade me can't draw 4shit._

_i can't draw hands lmao._

_Why am I here..._

Keith threw his pencil up in the air and caught it, adding to his picture. It was of Lance dancing, with the playground in the background (and a small Matt singing in the corner). What a song for Lance to have been singing and dancing to. It seemed to not match his voice perfectly, but he was still perfect. His voice was more suited for gentle songs. But, still pretty.

_Bzzt._

Keith looked over at his phone. One new message from Lance.

Lance

I'm all good.

Thx for earlier today

 

Keith

No problem. Text me anytime.

 

Lance

Do you mind a call?

 

Keith

Not at all.

Keith dialed Lance's number, and the brown-haired boy picked up immediately.

"Hey nerd."

"Hey loser." Lance replied, "Could've sworn you died earlier today."

"Nah, you can't get rid of me that easily."

"Oh no! Whatever shall I do!"

"You're terrible at being sarcastic."

Lance chuckled over the phone, "You're right, Mullet."

Keith collapsed down on his bed and smiled, "I don't have  _that_ much of a mullet. It's just a little longer than your hair."

"Still long."

"I didn't deny that."

Lance sighed, "What're you up to?"

"Laying here talking to you," Keith glanced at his tableside clock, reading  _7:03_ , "What about you? Wouldn't you have to sleep by now."

"I'm supposed to be, got lonely."

"I get that." Keith sighed, looking at his ceiling. There were a few moments of silence, and they were calm and peaceful. Keith was about to speak before-

"What's your favorite color?"

Thinking for a moment...

"Red. You?"

"Blue. But is yours a bright red, or like a dark, sexy red."

"Somewhere in the middle?"

"Sounds legit."

"Yeah."

More silence.

"How about drink?" Lance asked.

"Coke."

"Pepsi."

"You fuck. I feel betrayed." 

"I'm sorry I'm right." Lance sounded smug. What a dick, right?

"Fuck you."

"Fuck you again!"

"..."

"Wait-"

"Dumbass."

They both laughed, and Keith looked up at the ceiling, "What're you looking at right now?" he asked, thoughtfully.

Lanced paused before speaking, "Just around my room. You?"

"Just at the ceiling."

Lance chuckled again. Keith pictured his smile in his mind. Bright and pure. Probably laying on his bed, with one arm under his head. Probably just wondering what was to come in the future.

"What's your favorite song?" Keith asked.

Lance immediatly said, "Livin' la Vida Loca."

Keith just started laughing, "Are you kidding me? You have to be kidding."

"Sorry, but no. It's a jam."

"You're a dork, McClain."

"You're right. Can I ask what your favorite song is now?"

Keith was silent for a minute before answering, "Stairway to Heaven."

Lance laughed, "That better not be the only Led Zeppelin song you know," he kept laughing over the phone, "I'm gonna kick your ass if you say it is, dude."

"Nah, it's not, you dick."

Lance (still laughing), "Okay, good," he paused, "Any other songs I should know of?"

Keith smiled, "I'll make you a playlist, love."

"What?"

_SHIT._

"I mean 'Lance'. I'm sorry that was an accident-"

"Don't worry about it, dude. That's gay though."

Keith sighed, "I know. I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

Two boys, just laying in their beds. Looking at their ceilings.

"What're you going to be for Halloween?" Lance asked, breaking the silence.

"Oh fuck dude," Keith sighed, "I forgot it was Halloween soon."

"Come on, I'll be sporting Frodo from The Lord of The Rings! Hunk's gonna be Sam and Shiro said he'd be Legolas! IMAGINE that HAIR!" Keith laughed on the other side of the phone.

"Are all of you doing a group costume?"

"Yep!" Lance sounded so happy, "I think Katie is going to be Gandalf the Gray and Matt's going to be Bilbo! Do you want to tag along?"

Keith chuckled, "You got the room for an Aragorn?"

"You bet! I can help you make your costume and everything!"

* * *

 

_"We were all going to be there. Lance was going to be Frodo."_

_"He got the ring and everything. It was like nothing made him happier than talking about The Lord of The Rings."_

_"Yeah, and his favorite book was The Hobbit-"_

_" Is The Hobbit. I'll believe he's gone when I see it."_

-Hunk and Pidge, Halloween 2012

* * *

Keith remembered.

"Do you want to watch those movies sometime?" Keith asked, closing his eyes.

"Hell yeah, dude." Lance yawned.

Keith, still smiling, yawned too, "You tired?"

"Sleep is for the weak."

Keith rolled his eyes, "Well, I'm tired. I'm probably going to sleep."

"Okay, but that makes you weak." Lance teased.

"I'm not afraid to admit that I _am_ weak," Keith said, laying on his side and keeping his eyes closed.

"You got me there," Lance yawned again, "I envy you for that." 

"I'm sure you do..." Keith trailed off, "Good night... Lance.."

"Goodnight, mullet."

Keith snickered,  _Goodnight, Loverboy._ He thought.

And they both went to sleep.

And for one moment, all was well.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keith's Park drawing: https://demmikindd.tumblr.com/image/173231356036
> 
> I'll leave links when I upload all of his art! Thank you all for bearing with me!


	5. Heart - One Day Left

**September 23rd, 2016**

8:30

Shiro and Keith had been sitting at their table, waiting for Allura to come outside. Outside of a Starbucks, Keith was sipping his black tea with honey and Shiro was drinking pitch-black coffee by the gulp-full. It was autumn, and the air was crisp and cold. They were all meeting there to talk about what they wanted to do their english essays about. The topics were supposed to be reflections of a childhood event that changed their lives and finding a specific symbol to expand on. Or something, Keith was half-asleep during the lesson. Allura came out after a couple of minutes with a salted caramel hot chocolate, white scarf around her shoulders and a yellow beanie with a bright blue puffball at the end. There were leaves stuck in the sweater and the hat (and her hair), Keith thought it was kind of funny how much got stuck in her hair. That was before she and Shiro broke up. They had broken up because they both thought they were too close as friends to date, which was true in some ways, but they were happy for the first week or so. Allura had eventually ended up with some guy from another school, and Shiro had ended up dating Matt. But all was well. 

Keith was looking at his computer, at a blank google document, "The fuck..." He said, "I don't even know where to start with this."

"What were you thinking of writing about?" Allura asked, "I think Shiro and I wanted to go off of the same subject."

Keith sat back in his chair, "I wanted to write about moving to California in seventh grade. That certainly changed my life, and I was almost transferred somewhere else."

"Where were you almost transferred?" Allura asked.

"Chicago." Shiro answered for Keith, "And before you ask, he doesn't know where he would've gone."

Keith shrugged, sipping his tea, "Yeah, anyways, what do you guys want to write about?"

Allura sat her cup down on the table, "I was wanting to write about the symbolism with Lance and our old coffee shop. You know Elle's?"

"Of course I do."

"He used to go there with us all of the time. And by us I mean, y'know. Pidge, Matt, the three of us, Hunk-"

Shiro slammed his cup on the table, "You mean, 'THE BOYZ" tm?" (And yes, he said 'tm' out loud.) That was the name of their group chat. They were still 'THE BOYZ' even if Allura was in the group chat. That became a joke after Pidge made the group chat on accident and Matt named it. They guessed that the name just stuck, as they were all got sad about the thought of changing it.

Allura rolled her eyes, "Yes, 'THE BOYZ'," Shiro raised an eyebrow, "...Tm."

"Thank you."

"Anyways, I wanted to write about his disappearance and how that place was like an escape! You know?" Allura picked up her cup and continued to drink her hot chocolate, "Shiro, what were you thinking about?"

"The playground." He sat back in his chair, "It was my birthday, we went to the park, Lance was there earlier than everyone else with a bloody nose. He left right after giving me the gift he got." Shiro looked down, "It was a duct tape wallet. I still have it somewhere on my shelves at my apartment."

Keith sighed, "Do you even know where he went?" The two were silent, "Look, you talk about this dude all of the time, what was so special about this kid?"

Allura shook her head, "He was the kindest person I've ever met."

Shiro chuckled, "He was a dick at times, but he had a big heart," He took another cup of his coffee and shook his head, "I remember saying that he was going to meet someone at his house."

"We think something happened on his way home, because he never made it to his house, at least, that's what his mother told us." Allura sat tapping her finger on her arm, this made her uncomfortable.

Shiro sighed, "I wish I had never let him walk home by himself."

_I wish I had never let him walk home by himself._

~~_I wish I had never let him walk home by himself._ ~~

**~~_I WISH I HAD NEVER LET HIM WALK HOME BY HIMSELF._ ~~ **

* * *

 

  _Are you remembering?_

 

* * *

**October 26th, 2008**

7:55am

"LANCE!" gasping for air, bright light through dark blue curtains. It was morning.

Keith woke up in his bed, covered in sweat. That was no dream. That was a memory. A memory Keith had forgotten about. He wiped the sweat off of his forehead and his eyes drew towards his phone, and he had gotten a message.

Lance

Woke up early to get some work done at school

Lance

I have money to go to the craft store to make a birthday present for Shiro. I can catch you then if you want my help working on a costume :)

 

It was sent 6 minutes ago. Keith shot up out of bed, he had slept in his jeans and black baseball shirt. He put on deodorant and tried to type out a message.

 

Keith

ill bw therfe soon. are yhou waking pasyt my hlouse gthis morning? and whicbh cragt swotre?

 

He sent the message before he could check the spelling. _FUCK._ He thought.

  
Lance

yeah ill walk past you this morning. brilliant spelling btw

Keith

Sorry, I can meet you there after school, which craft store?

Lance

the one on the corner of yellow lane

i dont remember the name

Keith

Okay.

Lance

k

Keith grabbed his red jacket and tied it around his waist. He grabbed his wallet and phone and threw them into a side-bag and ran out of his room. He slid down the rail of his staircase, and just as he was about to leave-

"KEITH!"

He stopped at the door and winced, "Shit." he said to himself. He turned around to see his foster moms behind him, "Hey guys..."

"We've barely seen you, kiddo. Are you okay?" Lilo crossed her arms, she seemed concerned.

"You know," Camille, his other foster mom, began to say, "If we can do anything for you, please let us know?" They both sighed, "We're worried about you."

Keith leaned against the door, "Guys, I'm okay. Just a little stressed out. The whole..." he made some weird gestures with his hands, "Trying to make friends thing sucked." This was before his diagnosis of anxiety.

 _Maybe this can give them a heads up to let them know. Get those meds a couple months early._ Keith laughed to himself, in his head.

"I understand, I'm sorry," Camille sighed, then saw his bag. She narrowed her eyes, "That's not your school backpack mister," She sighed, "We're trying to help you out here. Please don't tell us you're ditching school again.?"

Keith shook his head, "Nah, I feel bad about that. I put my school shi- I mean stuff in this back already. I'm meeting a friend at an art store after school."

"Ooh!" Keith's not-sister(?) ran into the room, "Can you get me some Crayons!" asked Sylvie. 

Keith laughed, "Yeah, you got it." He leaned down for a fist bump, and Sylvie ran up and gave the fist-bump a high-five. It was adorable, so Keith laughed. It seemed to make Camille and Lilo happy, so that was good.

"Okay, kiddo. Can you be back by five? We want to make ribs."

 _Riiibbbbsssss._  

Now, Camille can't cook. At all. But if there's one thing she can make, it's a huge rack of ribs. And those were damn good.

_Except I haven't had them yet in this timeline._

Keith shrugged, "Alright. Do you mind if I maybe brought the friend back with me?"

Lilo nodded, "Bring him back with you, please. We won't be able to eat all of it."

"Of course," Keith smiled, "I'll be back by five. Thank you!"

"Have a good day, Keith!"

"Thanks, mom!" Keith called before he realized he wasn't adopted yet, "I mean... SORRY!"

Keith heard a chuckle from Camille, "It's okay, kiddo. Go out there and kick the world's ass today!"

"I will!"

And out the door, he went.

 

3:45pm

School had gone by quickly. Keith did what he normally did before he had friends, but this time people said hi to him in the hallways (people as in his weird group of friends). It was a little nervewracking. He ate lunch in the library and did his homework, he sketched a couple of figures, he went to his classes, normal school stuff. Lance had waited for him outside after school, even though his class got out 30 minutes earlier than Keith's. They walked to the craft store together, joking about smoking and pokemon and different pop-culture references from the time. Lance had a funny interest in Keith's old emo music, and Keith just listened to Lance's stories about his crazy family. It lasted up until they had picked out everything they needed from the craft store. Until...

"I do not have enough time to make a fucking longsword." Keith shook his head as Lance held up some craft foam proudly, "I am not doing that."

"Come oooonnnn! You gotta!" Lance batted his eyes,

"No."

Lance sighed, "¿Por favor? ¡Lo me va a alegrar!"

Keith shook his head, "What?"

Lance looked around, "¿Qué dije?"

"Dude. Come on."

Lance looked at the floor, eyes wide, "¡No sé lo que estoy diciendo!"

Keith grabbed Lance's shoulders, "Speak. English. I. Can't. Understand. You."

Lance's eyes went wide and he just stood there in silence for a bit.

Keith waved a hand in front of his face, "You all good?"

Lance was breathing heavily, "The fuuuuck."

"You know, it's okay-"

"No, I do that without realizing it, I'm sorry." Lance sounded hectic.

"Dude, I don't care, I think it's cool-"

"No, no it's not, I thought I had gotten that under control by now." Lance slapped himself in the face.

"It's all good-"

"Dude, I used to get my ass kicked for that."

Keith cocked his head, "Really? I'd think people would find it cool."

Lance laughed, "I thought that too." Lance grabbed the craft foam and the two started walking down the store aisles, "Dude I couldn't understand what people were saying and for some reason, people fuckin' hated me for that."

Keith looked confused, "But this is  _Oakland_. People speak Spanish all the time here."

"Uh-uh." Lance shook his head, "We moved here  _after_ I got my ass kicked."

"Oh shit, dude." Keith scratched his hand (an old nervous habit), "I'm... I'm sorry."

Lance shrugged, "It's all good, my siblings never got shit for speaking Spanish at school. I think people just thought I was a special case."

Keith sighed, "I was always the special case too if that helps you feel any better." Keith put his hands in his pockets, "Being the foster kid always sucked."

"I guess we're two threads of the same stitch." Lance laughed, as the two walked past the child's craft section, Lance swooped behind Keith and grabbed a box of crayons, "Think fast," and Lance threw them at Keith, who caught them with one hand.

Keith winked, "Nice try, Loverboy."

Lance laughed, "Loverboy?" putting his arm around Keith.

"It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?" Keith smiled.

"I suppose it does." Lance laughed and did a somersault (this kid had too much energy for Keith to handle, but he did enjoy it).

"What're you doing?" Keith laughed.

"Think about it!" Lance got up and gestured a lot with his hands, "Think of it! Loverboy Lance and! Uh...! Um..."

"Not a lot goes with Keith, huh?"

Lance thought, "Mullet Keith?"

"If you make that my nickname I'm gonna kick your ass."

"Okay so no. Um... What's your last name?"

"Kogane... Why..."

Lance shrugged, "I think I can work with that. Um..." he snapped his fingers, "KEITH KO _GAY_ NE!"

Keith shrugged, "That's m'name."

"No, but!" Lance looked excited, "Keith! Ko-GAY-ne! You know, because you're-"

Keith ran up and put his hand over Lance's mouth, "Dude, it's 2008! I could get my ass kicked for that!"

"Mrrpharphh." Lance muffled into his hand.

"What?" Keith whispered, "And keep your fucking voice low!"

"Okay, so...  _Not_ that."

"Yeah, no." Keith shrugged, "Sorry dude."

Lance looked down, then snickered to himself, "Keith McMullet."

"You're a fucking asshole."

They both burst into laughter.

"How did this start as us trying to buy costume shit?" Keith laughed, "Are we even going to work on that?"

Lance was smiling, such a bright smile, Keith loved it, "Didn't you say you have a lot of stuff for it at your house?"

"Yeah."

"Then you and I just have to work on the sword."

Keith rolled his eyes and laughed, "I don't know how to art and craft, dude."

"Bullshit," Lance said, lightly punching his shoulder, "I've seen your sketchbook, you've left it open on your desk before."               

Keith looked in his side-bag-thing to find his sketchbook, "Dude, these are my seventh-grade drawings, they suck!"

"You're  _still_ a seventh grader."

_Shit._

"Just my point! They suck!"  _Nice save, Keith._

"Here," Lance said, taking the sketchbook and opening to Keith's picture of a butterfly, "You see that! That=good! Now..." Lance took out a pencil, "May I?"

"Knock yourself out."

Lance scribbled a picture of him and Keith as stick figures, above, he wrote: "hi im keith, im SO emo". 

"I hate you."

Lance tapped his pencil on the sketchbook, "Do you see my shit? Stick figures ain't art, friend."

Keith shrugged, "Looks fine to me," He's done way better as an 21-year-old. He hated his art in 7th grade, but he knew he couldn't get better if he avoided it. So he continued to draw (what he considered to be) his shitty art.

"Dude, I have a point here." Lance did some more hand gestures (Keith was wondering if he'd ever run out of energy), "You: a good artist! Me: a not-artist and can't do art."

Keith shut the book and put it in his bag, "I'm sure you can draw with practice."

"Yeah, if I cared." Lance shrugged, "I'm more into dancing."

Keith stopped in his tracks, "You dance?!"

Lance swung his hips, "Jazz and salsa dancing." His hip swung into a rack of glitter glue, causing Keith to burst into laughter, "Laugh all you want, I know how to dance."

 Keith shrugged, "I wanted to dance. Being the foster kid, I never got the opportunity," He shrugged, "I could play guitar though, taught myself." 

Lance's eyes lit up, like his eyes were waves, crashing into each other on a sunny day. He grabbed Keith's hand, "I can show you how to dance if you play me a song!" Lance led Keith down the hallways, practically skipping, "I'll pay for the sword stuff, buy me ice cream!"

"Where are we going?! Am I playing guitar for you now?!" A confused Keith called, trying to keep up with Lance's long legs.

"The park, dumbass! Let's go!"

"What about the guitar?!"

"My sister Gabriella has one! I'll get her to give us a ride!" 

They stopped in the middle of the halls, Keith was coughing, we wasn't used to running, nonetheless down the aisles of a craft store. Lance didn't break a sweat. He worked out, dancing had to be a workout, right?

"If you can keep up, come with me!" Lance held his hand out.

Keith could've said no, or yes just out of pure spite. But...

That _smile._

Those  _eyes_.

Those brown curls framing his face.

His warm skin, like caramel.

Keith put his hand in Lance's. His hand was hot, Keith's were always cold. Keith smiled and they both closed their fingers around each other. 

Warm.

_He's so warm._

"I assure you, I can keep up," Keith smirked.

Lance squeezed his hand, "Good." And off they ran to the cashier.

The two were park-bound. 

4:00pm

"When's the last time you've even _tried_ to dance?"

"I don't know!"

Lance was holding Keith's hands trying to figure out how to teach the poor kid to dance. Keith was stepping on his own feet, and Lance was trying to figure out how to not get killed by this kid. They did spins (and by that, LANCE did spins while Keith held their hands in the air). There was an uncomfortable amount of being close. Lance would finish his spins and his chest would be on Keiths, foreheads connected, both of them catching their breath. Keith thought it was hot. Really hot, which is what made him uncomfortable. It would've been way less creepy if Keith wasn't nineteen. But...

They were so close. Dancing, singing to whatever songs were stuck in their heads. Hands on hips and being held. Keith's supposed to be playing him a song in a couple minutes, which he wasn't excited for. Gabriella had brought her guitar, just as Lance said she would. What would he sing? 

This would be remembered as his 7th-grade crush. What do you sing to your 7th-grade crush?

"You're not _horrible_ at this." Lance laughed before sitting at the picnic table the two had snagged, "But I thinking working on this sword is a better use of our time."

Keith laughed, sitting next to him, "Do I really need to make the sword?"

"Yes, yes you do." Lance said without looking at him, the boy was indulging in his ice cream (that Gabriella had gotten them. She got Lance mint-chocolate-chip, and Keith strawberry. She definitely earned some brownie points in Keith's book).

Keith sighed, using his jacket sleeve to wipe the sweat from his forehead, "I don't think I can keep up with you, Loverboy." 

They both chuckled, "I'm starting to like that nickname more." They smiled at each other, then Lance turned to the craft foam, "I'll make you a deal, Mullet-boy."

Keith rolled his eyes, "What?"

"I'll make the sword if you play me a song," Lance smirked. 

_That SMIRK!_

Keith let out a long, exaggerated sigh. Then he turned towards the blue-eyed boy, "The whole sword?"

"The whole sword."

Keith sat up on the table and propped the guitar up on his knee, "Alright, loverboy. Any requests?"

Lance clicked his tongue as he thought a little, "¿Qué es la cosa mas homosexual que puedo pensar en?" he said softly to himself.

"Dude, are you doing that on purpose?" Keith asked (referring to the Spanish speaking), earning a nod from Lance, "Well, what did you say? I KNOW I heard homosexual in that!"

"I'll tell you later." Lance smiled, earning an eyeroll from Keith, and continued clicking his tongue, until his eyes lit up, "What song reminds you of us?"

Keith sighed, "Jesus christ dude, are you as gay as I am?"

Lance shrugged, "Who knows? Anyways," Lance leaned on his hand, "I'm waiting."

Keith sighed again and took a look around the park.  _What the fuck, Lance. "Who knows?" YOU KNOW! POSSIBLY! You gonna leave a gay hanging?!"_ Keith thought, looking around the park.

Then, at a picnic table farther away, Keith saw it.

An asian guy (Keith didn't want to assume which country he was from) and a girl with tan skin and curly brown hair. The guy was smoking, wearing a Depeche Mode shirt; and the girl had a blue baseball shirt on with a blue flannel around her waist. Converse laced tied around her ankles, just like what Lance does. The guy had long-ish hair, which flowed through the wind, and he wore a red leather jacket. The boy held a strawberry ice cream cone, and the girl held a mint-chocolate chip scoop in a cup. The two laughed and kissed. Then the guy threw his cigarette on the ground and stepped on it. They were talking, Keith hoped it was about something nice. They walked over to a black pickup truck, and hopped into back compartment. They laughed for a little while... then they kissed. Keith felt a smile grow on his face. He hoped that couple was happy. That's when Keith looked back at Lance, and that smirk of his.

_What would happen if I sang a song that hasn't been invented yet?_

_Welp._

_Time to find out._

That's when Keith started strumming the chords to "Cigarette Daydreams".

_"Did you stand there all alone? Oh I cannot explain what's going down..."_

The chords, the song, it was all a part of him, Keith loved that song. The strings of the guitar flowed into Keith's voice. Now, Keith wasn't the best singer, but this song made every self-deprecating thought disappear. Keith had never thought about anyone when singing this, he mostly thought of this as a song to himself, helping him get through his hard times.  _Maybe..._ he thought,  _It's because I never had a person to sing this to._

_"You can drive all night, looking for the answers in the pouring rain."_

Lance looked up from his craft foam since he heard that, and saw Keith. One with the music. Keith could barely remember that there was someone sitting next to him. His eyes closed, just in touch with the song. It was unlike anything Lance had ever seen before.

_"Funny how it seems like yesterday,_

_as I recall, you were looking out of place._

_Gathered up your things and slipped away..."_

Lance put his craft foam down and just leaned on the table, watching him play.

_"So sweet, with a mean streak,_

_Nearly brought me to my knees!"_

Keith's hand strummed those strings like there was no tomorrow, as if that was the last time he would ever play guitar, the last time he'd ever sing.

_"If you can find a reason, a reason to stay,_

_Standing in the pouring rain!"_

Keith's fingers started bleeding from strumming so hard. He didn't even feel it. The music was all that mattered. Lance was all that mattered.

_Lance._

Lance looked up, and he chuckled. Flying around the guitar was a blue butterfly. 

 _It matches my eyes,_  Lance thought.

Keith strummed hard, voice almost yelling. It was powerful and intense. Until all at once...

It became soft. Keith sang lighter, used a different voice register, just a little lighter.

_"You can drive all night,_

_looking for the answers in the pouring rain._

_You wanna find peace of mind_

_Looking for the answer_

_If we can find a reason, a reason to change_

_Looking for the answer_

_If you can find a reason, a reason to stay_

_Standing in the pouring rain."_

The last strum held on just long enough before Keith placed his palm on the strings, silencing them. When Keith looked down at Lance, he saw tears falling down his face. 

"Oh, fuck shit fuck." Keith put the guitar on the table and sat next to Lance on the bench, wiping the tears from Lance's cheeks, "What happened? I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm so so-"

Lance chuckled, "So that's your reminder?"

Keith nodded, "Yeah. I guess you didn't like it." Lance was silent, shutting his eyes. Keith kept his hands on Lance's cheeks, "Hey you, you've got ice cream on your cheek." Keith moved his fingers to wipe it off, and Lance looked up at him. Had they somehow gotten closer? 

Keith felt his face going red, Lance was close.  _So close._

_His big blue eyes, his cute button nose, his freckles, his hair that smelled like marshmallow._

_Too close..._

Keith let go of Lance's cheeks and sat back up on the table, "I... I'm sorry I made you cry."

Lance shook his head and laughed, "Come on, you know you sounded great." Keith shook his head, "I've never heard anyone sing like that before."

Keith shrugged, "It was nothing special."

"Keith Kogane," Lance grabbed his shoulders, "It was amazing!" Keith just sat there, shocked. "I just want you to know something."

Keith moved closer to Lance as he put his arm around Keith, "What?"

Lance put his hand on Keith's, "You're so different. You're unlike anyone I've ever met. You're the kind of person someone would only imagine. Yet here you are." Lance laughed, thank god he couldn't see Keith's face. It was bright red. Keith was trying to find a heterosexual explanation for it all. Lance had to mean all this in a friend way, right? He needed it to be in a friend way. He couldn't do it. He couldn't have this mean anything. He couldn't do it.

This boy was in sixth grade. Still young. Still pure. Damaged but not dumb. There's still hope.

"Keith, you're the most amazing person I've ever met."

Keith laughed, "Lance... I'm a mess."

Suddenly, Keith's heart started beating fast. Too fast. Not in a good way. He felt his breathing speed up.

 ~~~~Until the shaking stopped. Everything seemed to stop.

Lance was holding him. A hand cupped behind Keith's head, arm around his shoulders. Keith could feel his heartbeat. He could hear Lance's heartbeat.

"It's okay. You're okay."

Keith shut his eyes, "Is it okay?" 

Lance ran his fingers through his hair, nodding, "It's okay, I'm right here." He shushed, "Don't worry."

Keith let himself cease his tensing. Let himself relax. He put his arms around Lance's waist. It was weird. A feeling of security Keith had never felt before, even when he was nineteen. Keith realized pretty quickly how weird this was.

_I'm nineteen. This is wrong._

Keith forgot he was an adult.

For a while, he was just there, being a normal kid.

_Do I have an opportunity to be normal?_

The idea was too good to be true. Think about it, a foster kid, an orphan that has never felt like he belonged. What if he gave himself a normal childhood? Would he be himself anymore? Would he be happier? 

Then as if it had never happened, Lance let go of Keith, "You better, mullet-head?" Lance asked, smiling.

Keith just smiled and nodded, "Yeah, man."

"Good." Lance smiled, grabbing Keith's hand, "Dude, what song is that?"

_How do you talk about a song that doesn't exist yet?_

Keith just shrugged, "You know, I don't remember."

"Come on!" Lance lightly shoved Keith's shoulder, "You have to give me something!"

"I really don't know, man!" Keith laughed, "Sorry I can't help you there."

"Alright, well, you gotta email me a video of you singing that, I want to show my family." 

Keith smiled at him, "You got it."

Lance (once again) smiled at Keith and put his arm around him. Keith looked up at the sky, "How long did you dance?" 

"Well..." Lance sighed, "I did Salsa dancing for a couple years of elementary, but I stopped 'cause it was too much of a stereotype. I've been doing jazz dancing since I was 6... So... six-ish years?"

Keith held Lance's hand, softly running his thumb up and down Lance's hand, "That's cute, you know? You know how to move, McClain."

Lance moved his shoulders up and down, "I do, do I?" The boys laughed, "Why to thank you, but I can't make you cry while dancing." Keith still felt bad about that, he just shrugged.

"I didn't mean to make you cry-"

"No, dude, it's okay." Lance squeezed Keith a little closer to him, "That was something I've never seen before, it was awesome."

Keith could feel his face getting red, he was really bad at taking compliments, always has been. He shook his head and laughed, "No, dude. Shut the fuck up." He lightly pushed Lance's face away from him, "Your sister plays right? I'm sure she's a lot better than I am."

"Dude, stop. Take a damn compliment."

"Not gonna happen," Keith rolled his eyes, "Are you not going to stop until you win?"

"Pretty much."

"You suck."

Lance smirked, "I'm sure you swallow." Causing a gasp from Keith, "what?"

Keith smacked him, "Suck my fucking dick, dude."

"Okay. Ow." Lance wasn't hurt, just surprised, "I deserved that."

Keith rolled his eyes and shook his head at Lance.

"What are you looking at, Hot Topic?" Lance asked.

_Okay, dick._

Keith smirked, "Awe, you think I'm hot."

_Vine doesn't exist yet so he probably thinks I'm clever._

Lance rolled his eyes, which was followed by Keith leaning into him.

The two sat in silence, looking around the park. It was calm. The weather was warm, with a chill breeze. A little cold, but still cozy and comfortable. There were some dogs running around catching tennis balls, and more teenagers walking around with ice cream. They looked like the kind of kids Keith would've spent most of his time with if he hadn't talked to Lance and Shiro and all of those guys. They all had piercings, stick+poke tattoos, beanies, emo band t-shirts, ripped jeans, long, dyed hair. Keith had a bottle of white hair dye sitting at his desk at home. He cringed, remembering his 7th-grade terrible white-dye decision. It sure was funny to look back on, though. He might just go home and do the deed in a couple days. That is, if he stays in the past that long.

Speaking of...

When would he go back? Lance seemed to be connected to all this. Maybe... If Lance doesn't disappear... Everything would be okay. It would go back to normal.

What about the future? Would he still know Lance in the future? Would everything be okay?

Would Lance still care about Keith in the future?

"What do you think will happen in the future?" Lance asked, breaking the silence.

_Okay, that was creepy._

_How the fuck do I answer that?_

Keith knows exactly what's going to happen in the future. He's going to be adopted by his foster family a week from now, he's going to get addicted to smoking and popping anti-depressants and go to rehab. He's going to be welcomed back by Shiro and Matt, then he'll meet Katie and Hunk and Allura. He'll graduate high school and go to DVC with all of his friends while they earn credits to get into private schools. Shiro wants to be an engineer and go into space someday, as does Matt; Katie/Pidge wants to be a theoretical physicist (Keith and Hunk make fun of them for it), Hunk is really smart but wants to be a chef, and Keith is just trying to get through a day without flunking out.

They all have pictures of them and Lance up in their room. It's the same photo. Them and Lance hanging out in a library, Keith happened to be in the back of the photo, white hair and black eyeliner in their finest. 

In the future, Lance's family fell apart without their son. Nobody knew what happened to him, as he left without saying anything.

In the future, Lance was missing.

"I don't know." Keith sighed, squeezing Lance's hand, "The future scares me."

Lance smiled, "There are worse things to be scared of."

Keith glanced at the ground, then at Lance, who was looking at the sky, "What are you scared of, McClain?"

Lance was silent, then shrugged, "Acceptance."

Keith looked at the ground, "I understand."

"No, you don't."

Keith sighed, "Well, it depends on what you mean by acceptance."

Lance put his other arm around Keith, holding his own hands, "Remember yesterday?"

"How could I forget?"

"Okay. Well," Lance sighed, "I heard my mom and her boyfriend talking. They're worried about me liking boys."

"Did you tell them?"

Lance shook his head, "Her boyfriend went through my emails."

_Oh shit._

_Oh shit._

Keith sat up and looked at Lance, "Dude what the fuck, that's NOT okay."

Lance shrugged, "Whatever, it's happened already, nothing I can do about it."

Keith paused, "Wait, then how are you scared of acceptance?"

"What if my mom sides with me and he hurts any of my family members?" Lance shivered, "He's crazy."

"Sure sounds like it." Keith took hold of Lance's hands,

_This is my chance to find out what happened. Or... Happens._

"What are you going to do, Love?"

Lance gulped, "I don't know... I.. I can't tell you." He shook his head, "I really can't... I don't know-."

"Shhh, breathe, okay? Please." Keith asked, putting his hand on Lance's cheek. He wasn't paying attention to what people might be saying or thinking of them. He didn't care, "Lance, what's going-"

Suddenly, he couldn't breathe through his mouth. Everything got warm, and Keith felt his heart speed up. 

_Oh my god._

He kissed him. Lance kissed him.

* * *

_He'll be here soon._

* * *

4:25pm

Keith couldn't think straight. His thoughts were everywhere.

What does he do from here? He's going to go back to the future at some point, and he'll probably forget that all of this ever happened.

_What just happened...?_

Keith didn't know what to say. It was quiet. Too quiet. He was leaning against Lance, who was holding his hands. Neither of them seemed what to know what to say.

"Sorry."

Nevermind. 

Lance broke the silence.

Keith turned to him, "Why are you sorry?"

"Because I didn't ask... and... I just shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry-"

"Hey, hey," Keith shushed, "It's okay, love." He kissed Lance's hands and held them tightly.

 _Maybe..._ Keith's eyes lit up, "Lance, can you come over for dinner tonight? In like... Half an hour?"

Lance smiled, "What's being served, mullet?"

"Ribs. You in or out?"

Lance nodded, "In."

Keith brought Lance's hand up to his mouth and kissed it lightly, "Perfect." He jumped out of his seat and bowed, putting his hand out for Lance, "Shall we?"

Lance snorted and laughed, "Okay, too much."

"Welp. I tried." The two laughed walking down the street.

Keith shrugged. These interactions may be weird, but he may as well enjoy these times with Lance before he disappears. Who knows when he would see Lance again after that?

 

6:30pm

Dinner went pretty well. 

Keith's  ~~moms~~ foster moms seemed to like Lance, even though he talked with his mouth full and had barbeque sauce all over his mouth and hands. Keith never realized how much Lance talked with his mouth full before he brought him over. Fortunately, Lilo and Camille didn't seem to mind. Sylvie was having a blast. Lance had handed her the crayons when he walked in the door, and from then on, Keith had lost his friend to his sister. Lance was so good with kids, frighteningly good. He had a bunch of siblings, so that was obviously where the nurturing side came from. Sylvie was copying everything Lance did, she ate more sloppily and smeared the sauce on her face and dress. Lance was amused. The moms? Not so much. They seemed to really like Lance, but not so much how Sylvie seemed to be in love with everything Lance was doing. Honestly, Keith knows his moms are just happy he's not off somewhere smoking weed.

It was funny. Keith had barely spoken a word since they’ve gotten back to his house. Lance had talked to his foster moms about everything. How they met, class differences, age gaps, music taste, favorite colors, his siblings, their crazy stories... But his mother.

Lance loved his mother. He talked about her and there was a special gleam in his eyes. He talked about her mother having to put up with six kids, he talked about her love for music, for dancing, the way she cooks, the way she just... is.

Funny thing, he talked about her, but only mentioned the boyfriend in good light. He had been with Lance's mom since Lance's dad passed away, so almost two years.  _Maybe that's why Lance is scared about Lance accepting him._ Everything seemed so pure, so full of light.

Is this the happy, cheery Lance McClain everyone was talking about all of those years?

Did none of them know the truth?

The two had finished eating the ribs and retired to the living room, where Keith insisted they work on their birthday presents while watching Fellowship Of The Ring. When Keith brought up the idea, Lance got so excited, it was adorable.  _This kid really likes this series._ They had talked about Lord of the Rings during dinner too. Lance apparently loved it so much because it gave him an escape. A whole new world where there were dragons and elves and magic and everything he could dream of. Lance's escape was Lord of The Rings. It was adorable.

They sat on the floor facing the TV, where hobbits danced around gleefully. There was a table in between them, where the birthday present materials were scattered. Keith was making Keith a large leather bracelet with some cool beading. Lance was making a duct tape wallet.

"Fuck off, dude, that looks hard." Lance was cracking up, "This looks like shit." Lance exclaimed, holding up the duct tape mess.

"Hey, that's because the wallet's not done yet." Keith smiled, "This ol' thing might fall apart in two minutes after I give it to Shiro."

Lance looked at Keith, and they made awkward eye-contact. Causing both boys to break into laughter, then continue working. 

"Hey.. dude." Lance began,

"Hmm?" Keith looked up.

"What happened today, is it really okay?" Lance looked so nervous.

Keith smiled, lifting up Lance's hand, "You mean this?" He said, kissing it.

Lance blushed, it was a bright tomato red, "Just making sure, Mullet."

"Okay, you ruined the moment by calling me mullet."

They both laughed, "Well, then get rid of the mullet."

"Hell no!"

"Then you're asking for it."

Lance laughed as Keith rolled his eyes, "You are ridiculous."

They both smiled, then went back to work. Ten minutes or so passed, Keith was just about finished with his bracelet when Lance proudly held up the finished duct tape wallet. 

"Is it good?" Lance asked.   
The wallet was black and silver. With multiple pockets and a five dollar bill in the... Uhh... Dollar bill part of the wallet?

Keith smiled, "Yeah, Love. It's really good."

They both just sat there smiling at each other. Too good to be true.

_This is too good to be true._

Then it happened, Lance got a phone call, "Hold on a second," He picked up the call, "¿Si mamá?"

On the other end was a just jumble of spanish that Keith couldn't understand, it sounded panicky.

“Okay, okay, I’ll be home soon. Te amo.” Lance hung up.

Keith sat up, “Are you okay?”

”Yeah, uhm...” Lance sighed, packing all of his stuff in his school bag, “She just told me to be home quickly.” Lance stood up, pulling his backpack over his shoulders, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Keith stood up, “Yeah, you will.”

”Okay,” Lance began tieing his shoes, “THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME FOR DINNER!” Lance yelled to Keith’s parents.

”No problem, come over anytime, Lance!” They heard Lilo call from the other room.

”Okay.” Lance leaned over to Keith and kissed his cheek, “I’ll see you tomorrow, love. Goodnight.” and on that note, Lance ran out of the house.

Keith just stood there, hand on his cheek. He was worried. On the TV, Bilbo Baggins disappeared, and the Hobbits screamed in fright, afraid that they may never see him again.

**October 27th 2008**

7:30am

Keith woke up to his phone ringing, he looked up and glanced over.

_7 missed calls from Lance._

_Oh shit._

Keith dialed the number. It rung for too long.

"Keith?!" Lance was sobbing, hysterically, Keith could barely understand him.

"Lance? What's going on-"

"My parents found out, her boyfriend saw me kiss you in the park and I don't know what to do and I'm freaking out and-"

"Hey woah slow down!" Keith sat up, he was terrified, "Lance, what happened?"

"He kicked me out, Keith." Lance cried, "He kicked me out."

 

 

 


	6. The Rain.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the day Lance went missing nine years ago. Will Keith be able to stop Lance from leaving, or will he have to let him go?

**October 27th, 2008**

7:30am

** Trigger warning: homo/biphobia **

 

"He kicked me out, Keith. He kicked me out."

_This is my fault._

Oh my god.

~~**_This is all your fault._ ** ~~

Keith was speechless. It felt like time had stopped moving. Everything was cold. The air, Keith's heart, Lance's sobs over the phone.

"Lance... I..." Keith didn't know what to say, "Breathe, okay? And tell me what happened."

Lance was quivering, he was probably outside in the cold. Keith hoped he was walking to Hunk's house for the breakfast they give to him Katie and Matt in the morning. Keith hoped with all of his heart that Lance was going to get food and not crying alone.

"Lance... Please tell me." Keith begged.

Lance was breathing heavily, probably trying to slow down so he could get a sentence out, "Okay..." he took one more deep breath.

"It's okay, I'm right here, just tell me."

A sigh came from over the phone, "When I got home, Mom and I went up to my room, and she asked about if I was gay or not. I was telling her no. She tried to tell me that it was okay but she didn't really know how to feel about it. She said she loves me anyways and all of that..." Lance took another deep breath, "A couple hours after she left and went to bed with her boyfriend, I was awake crying because... Heh... I'm just as emo as you sometimes."

Keith rolled his eyes over the phone. Even when sad, Lance can still be funny.

"Well... I was awake, right? And mom's boyfriend came in. And he's terrifying so I was just trying not to cry. He sat down next to me and told me in his scary voice, 'Listen up, kid. I don't want no cocksucker, around my family.' I told him that I'm twelve and so I'm not. And he rolled his eyes so I also said that it's not his family, and uh..." Lance paused, coughing, "I kind of got my ass handed to me-"

"What the fuck did he do?" Keith snapped, jumping out of bed, struggling to get the fuck out of his pj's to get some normal clothes on, "I'll fucking kill him. If he put a hand on you I'll fucking kill him-"

"Keith... Keith stop."

"I swear to god, Lance!"

"KEITH." Lance yelled over the phone.

Keith was taken aback. He had never heard Lance yell before, "Okay... Okay, I'm sorry," Keith slipped his red flannel over his black t-shirt and sat back down, trying not to sound so upset, "Continue."

"He told me that he didn't want me coming back until I admitted that I didn't like guys. I told him to go to hell." 

Keith sighed, "Dude I admire your spunk but if he's as crazy as you make him sound then that probably wasn't the best idea."

"I know, I know," Lance sniffed,

"Wait..." Keith thought out loud, "Isn't it, like, 100% illegal to kick an underage kid out of the house?"

"I don't know," Lance was trying not to sob, "My mom didn't kick me out. He threatened me. He said he'd hurt my sister or my mom or me... I don't fucking care about me getting hurt." Lance was beginning to sound angry, "But he threatened to hurt my _mother_."

Keith didn't know how to respond. There isn't much they can do, nobody'll believe two middle schoolers, "What if she leaves him?"

"Hell no. No fucking way. If she does that, it's not because I told her too," Lance sniffed again, "I want her to figure him out for himself." Keith could hear Lance punch or kick something over the phone, "FUCK. *sigh*I can't go to school today. I'm too scared. And... Fucked up and frustrated..."

Keith sighed, standing up and continuing to get dressed, "I understand, do you want me to come with you?"

"Come see me at the park this morning, but then go to school. I need time to myself today." 

Keith was trying not to cry. He punched himself in the gut, focusing pain elsewhere, "I understand. Will I see you at the party?"

"I think so." Lance gasped on his side of the phone, " I have to go." Then he hung up.

_Lance, what have you gotten yourself into?_

7:45am

There he was.

Lance.  
Sitting on the swingset, nose bleeding, sobbing. Huge bruise on his cheek.

Keith ran over to him and engulfed him in a hug, "Oh honey..." Keith held back tears, "What did he do to you..."

Lance chuckled, "I said too much, again." He got off of the swingset and hugged Keith back. Keith was quivering.

"This is all my fault... I'm sorry..." Keith cried, "I'm so sorry."

"Hey, hey," Lance held Keith's shaking face, "I'm the one who kissed you, remember?" Keith showed no response, "And I wouldn't trade that kiss for the world."

Keith looked up at Lance. Tears escaped his eyes, and Lance wiped them away, "Lance..." Keith whimpered-

He was interrupted by Lance's lips on his. It took Keith's breath away. He was too weak to argue, too hurt to push him away; too afraid to push him away. He did end up breaking the kiss though and burying his head in Lance's chest.

"I wouldn't trade that one either," Lance chuckled, "I have nothing left to lose."

Keith shrugged, "I suppose." He sighed and took both of Lance's hands in his, "Please let me stay with you today," Keith begged, "Please."

Lance shook his head, "I need this day for me. I can't do it... I can't, Keith."

Keith sighed, there was no arguing with Lance. He had to respect it.

_Lance disappeared after he gave Shiro the duct tape wallet._ _I still have time._

"Tell me when you get to Shiro's birthday party?" Keith asked,

"You got it." Lance smiled, kissing Keith's forehead. They shared a minute of silence. Lance brushed Keith's hair out of his face, causing Keith to take Lance's hand and hold it against his cheek.

"You're something else, you know that?" Keith asked, smiling.

Lance smiled, then laughed and lightly shoved Keith away, "Don't make me cry, Mullet."

"Hey, you made me cry first." Keith laughed.

Lance rolled his eyes with that _damn smirk_ , "Get out of here and get to school, dummy."

Keith nodded, "Fine." He began to walk away, he looked back, "Lance,"

Lance smiled at him, "Yes?"

"Don't forget to call me."

Lance smiled, "I could never forget."

Keith smiled and nodded. Then he turned around to walk to school. After a few steps, Keith turned around. And Lance was gone. Keith took a deep breath, then kept walking.

 

3:45pm

The party was in 15 minutes, it was already starting to get dark and cloudy outside. And where was Keith? 

Sitting outside the principal's office.

Keith didn't want to think of it as his fault. Throwing the punches was definitely Keith's fault, but it's not like he threw them for no reason. 

Keith was walking in the hallway of his school. He heard voices, all around him, it seemed. Caught up in the midst of their own angsty conversations, except Keith could only hear the bad ones. Coming from all around him.

"Where's Lance?"

"He's here every day."

"I heard he got kicked out."

"Yikes."

"Did you hear he kissed a guy?"

"Jesus christ."

"Lance McClain?"

"What a faggot."

That's when Keith lost it. He turned to the kid that said it and punched him square in the jaw. He had been called much worse in his life, but none of those kids had any idea what being outed was like, it was too easy for them. Those kids wanted to be caught up in other's lives, if they did that, they didn't have to deal with the hardships in their own lives. After throwing the punch, Keith had collapsed in the hallway, "It's not his fault." He had cried, "Shut the fuck up... Shut the FUCK UP." He kept screaming and sobbing until Shiro and Matt ran up and got him off the floor. Matt had started cursing everyone out and Shiro was just trying to get Keith to stand up straight. That was a middle school thing. Keith couldn't stop crying no matter what. Matt had taken Keith off campus to get him some food from Starbucks, which Keith had to practically choke down. They both came back at lunch and sat with the normal friend group of theirs. Shiro told him that the school hasn't said a word since that punch was thrown. Keith was just glad he got those damn middle schoolers to shut the fuck up.

But where had it gotten Keith?

Outside of the principal's office. Waiting for Camille and Lilo to get out so he can get the fuck out of there.

After a few more minutes, his moms came out of the office.

Camille sighed, "Three days suspension."

"Isn't that the rest of the week?" Keith asked.

"Yup."

Keith sighed, at least he had longer to work on his Halloween costume.

They had gotten out of there by 3:50. Lilo had immediately run off to work on pick up Sylvie from daycare. The weather was dark and cloudly _, It's going to rain soon._ Keith thought.

Camille knelt down beside Keith, "What were you doing, kiddo?"

Keith shrugged. He shrugs a lot.

"He called me a fag." Still not exactly the truth, but close enough.

Camille shook her head, "Okay, Keith, I don't blame you, but we need to work on this together, okay?" Keith nodded, and Camille squeezed his shoulder, "That's my boy." Won't lie, that made Keith smile. 

Camille pulled out the bracelet that Keith had made for Shiro, and Keith realized he forgot it, in too much of a rush this morning trying to get to Lance that he lost sight of one of the things he actually had to go to today.

"Thanks, Cam." Keith smiled, putting the bracelet on for safekeeping, "Uhh... What time is it?"

Camille looked at her watch, "Um... 3:55?"

_Shit._

_SHIT._

Keith started walking backward, "Okay, I love you and all, but I really have to get going, I have that party and... You know?"

Camille smiled, "Have fun, kiddo. Okay?"

Keith nodded, realizing that that was the first time he's said "I love you" to one of his foster moms. Keith flashed a thumbs up, then ran off towards the park.

_Please let there be more time._

_Please give me more time._

4:05pm

Keith kept running, the park was too fucking far away. He was late one way or another, but he had to speed up. 

_Come on, Keith._

_You can go faster than this, come the FUCK on._

He was losing breath. He could see the park but he was gasping. 12 years old... Keith can't run any faster, he knows this, but he's trying.

_Please go faster. Please let Lance be there. Please._

_I'm so close._

_I'm so-_

Keith forgot that there was a ledge disconnecting the concrete of the street from the grassy area of the park. He faceplanted on the grass, re-opening the scratch on his cheek from two days ago.

"FUCK!" Keith screamed, feeling the blood start to drip down his cheek and forehead. He held his flannel sleeve up to his head, trying to stop the forehead wound from dripping into his eyelashes. Gross, but it's happened to Keith before.

He looked around, he couldn't see anyone. Keith then felt a vibration in his pocket, he pulled his phone out and read the text.

 

Matt

Hey bro. We saw that it was gonna rain and so we went to Elles coffee

_God damnit._

Keith

Did you guys see Lance already?

 

Matt

Lance? 

 

Keith

This is a texting thread, yes Lance.

 

Matt

Uhh, i think so. He made the duct tape wallet, right?

_OH NO._

Keith

Matt. Is he with you.

Lance promised he'd text Keith. Right?

Keith checked his call history.

_Three missed calls from Lance._

_No._

_No no NO!_

**_One notification from: Matt_ **

Matt

I-

 

Keith's phone died before he could finish reading it.

"FUCK!" He cried, "God fucking damn it!" He cried, voice cracks showing up after half of his words.

~~You did this, Keith.~~

_No, I didn't... This wasn't me._

~~**_Yes it was._ ** ~~

_Shut the fuck up._

Keith punched himself in the face, getting the blood from his cheek on his hand.  _Shit._

It was starting to rain. A couple raindrops landed in the gash on Keith's cheek, causing unbearable stinging. If only Lance was here to bandage it... Just one more time.

Keith shook it off and began running to Elle's, it's not too far. And if Lance is there, he has to catch him before he leaves. 

 

4:11pm

Late. Too late.

Keith looked in through the window, and there were his friends. All laughing, talking. The whole cafe seemed to be loud and happy. Shiro had birthday presents being handed to him, ~~Pidge~~ Katie was braiding Allura's long hair, Matt and Hunk seemed to be talking about something intense, probably Star Wars. Those two love Star Wars.

But no Lance.

The duct tape wallet sat on the floor, Shiro was placing birthday money in the pockets.

But no Lance.

Keith ran inside, tired and soaking wet, as it was now pouring outside.

His friends all went silent except Shiro, "Keith... Bro, are you okay?"

Keith was choking on air, "Where's Lance?"

Shiro looked around, then everyone turned to Hunk who innocently said, "Home, he went home."

"God damn it."

Keith ran out of the Cafe without another word, without another thought. 

Keith began to run again, in the direction of Lance's house.

_Left turn._

_Right turn._

_Straight._

_Left turn._

_Left turn._

Keith heard a large group of people mumbling, and he skidded to a halt, nearly slipping and falling again in the process. Keith ran to a corner next to a shady street, and a plain grey van drove past him, splashing his jeans and shirt in the process. 

_Thanks, dick._

The van parked next to a sidewalk, which was close to where the shady street met the main road. Keith edged closer and closer to the van, to the whispering voices. Keith stopped in his tracks when he heard the van door open. He heard two men and one woman laughing. Not in an evil way, but more relieved and happy to see each other.

"Right on time as always." one of the men said. Keith heard the small sound that happens when two people go in for a bro hug, like the little clasp.

The female laughed, "You're a lifesaver, Drew."

The other guy (who was apparently Drew) chuckled, "Hey, I like what I do."

The other male opened an umbrella, a rather large one, and called to the voices in the street, "Okay," He paused, then raised his voice a little, "You guys all ready? Do any of you need anything else?"

"Ruby needs her insulin!" A voice commented.

"You said you could grab me a watch?"

The adult woman pulled something out of her bag, "You got it, guys!" She tossed a watch and some weird needles in plastic wrap (that must be the insulin) into the alleyway, "You guys all good?"

"Yep!" A bunch of teenage-sounding people answered.

_This is shady as fuck.  
Are none of them scared?_

"We're going to start roll call," The woman announced, "Are you all sure about this?"

There were some "sure"s, some "Yes"s, but Keith knew there were more people than those who were speaking. He assumed they just nodded.

An older boy (around 17-18 looking) ran up and asked the adults something, it was inaudible.

"Yeah, yeah, sure." Drew nodded, "What's the kid's name?"

"Lance McClain. The situation is something about a stepdad threatening him."

That's when Lance stepped into view. He looked messy. A full backpack slung over one shoulder, holding a large navy blue pillow and a stuffed shark. He wore filthy black converse, ripped black jeans, a black t-shirt that said "Space Cadet" on it, all under the hood of that puffy blue jacket.

That blue jacket.

That was the jacket he wore the day he met Keith. Big blueberry boy. He was so happy, full of laughter and happiness. His smirk and winks and his kindness and... And...

It was all gone.

The blue jacket was there, but it seemed to be a completely different person. Lance had band-aids all over the gashes that were on his face earlier, his bruises still were visible underneath. Eyes puffy from crying earlier that day, and the puffy blue jacket had some blood on it still.

_Honey... What did they do to you?_

"LANCE!" Keith put his hand over his mouth the second it escaped. It was pouring outside, so he ended up slamming water into his mouth, causing him to choke. The adults looked frightened, and there were gasps coming from around the corner in that alleyway.

"Keith?!" Lance gasped, then turning to the adults, "It's okay, he's my friend."

Keith was speechless, he walked around the corner to see Lance. And what he saw broke his heart. There were children ranging between eleven and nineteen standing in that alleyway. There were about 13 of them, counting Lance. All of those kids looked lost, broken... Keith knew what it looked like, he had been there before.

He remembered when he was in 5th grade. Fourth foster home, he was in Atlanta, Georgia. He had run away from his house at the time, he ran under a freeway bridge and just sat there, sobbing. Hoping someone would come to hug him, help him, maybe even notice that he was there.

And no one came for Keith.

That feeling came back to him too fast. All of these broken children. All with backpacks and pillows, some had stuffed animals (Lance was the only one who had a stuffed shark. Of course he had a shark. It was adorable).

Keith started to tear up, "Lance, what're you doing here..." Keith was choking. He knew exactly what Lance was doing, he was just too scared to admit it to himself.

Lance sighed and looked at the ground, he handed his backpack, pillow, and shark to that "Drew" guy, who said they were going to start packing up people's things and taking a headcount.

"Lance... LANCE!" Keith was crying, "Get the FUCK over here!"

"Okay, I'm coming," Lance nodded to the adults, then took Keith's hand and took him a little farther away.

"Get the fuck off of me," Keith wiped his tears and took his hand back from Lance, "Where are you going?"

Lance looked at Keith, wide-eyed and sighing, "What happened to your cheek, love?"

Keith felt the blood from the gash drip into his mouth, he wiped it off and just felt angry.

**~~Look who it is.~~ **

**~~Another person about to leave you.~~ **

**~~Again.~~ **

~~Stop.~~

~~SHUT THE FUCK UP!~~

~~**You knew it was bound to happen.** ~~

~~**This is your fault, Keith.** ~~

~~**This is your fault.** ~~

"STOP!" Keith cried, grabbing his head.

Lance stepped back, "Keith-"

"Lance, what the fuck are you doing?!" Tears and water had numbed his cheek, Keith was hoping he'd feel numb. He'd give anything to not hurt as much as he did, "Damn you... What is this?!"

Lance looked behind him to see the kids talking to the adults, giving and receiving hugs before they go inside the van. He turned back to face Keith, "These are people that help kids like me."

"Oh, like what?" Keith was sounding cocky now.

"In case you forgot, I'm too scared to go home. I'm too scared for myself, too scared for my family, too scared to..." Lance shivered, "To find out what he'd say to my mother, my family... What kinds of lies he would tell about me." Lance sighed and looked up, raindrops landing on his freckles, "I'd rather just disappear."

"No, no no no you don't." Keith shook his head, trying to make himself angry so it didn't hurt, "You're going to come with me, stay with my family, I'll keep you safe!"

"You barely know me!"

"That doesn't mean I don't want to!" Keith cried.

Then silence.

Dead silence.

The two stood a good two or three feet away from each other. Piercing eye contact and pained breathing. Keith trying not to cry and Lance trying to stand his ground.

Keith looked down at the ground. No more holding it in, he was sobbing.

"What if you regret it?" Keith choked, "What if you want to come back?"

_You're going to come back, I know._

But what if he stayed?

What if he stayed and grew up with his friends.

_Keith, no messing with time._

Keith blinked, and there was the butterfly again. It flew past the kids loading into the van and landed on Lance's shoulder. But Lance didn't seem to be able to feel or see it this time.

_You can't fix this, Keith._

_If he doesn't leave now, he'll leave again soon._

_Sometimes, you have to let people go._

_No... No, I can't._

_In that hospital bed, he was dead, right?_

_I can't let him die..._

_Keith..._

_Trust me._

Lance smiled, "If I want to come back, then I will."

Keith walked over to Lance and put a hand on the blue boy's cheek.

"Where are you going?"

Lance looked behind him, "Drew, Andy, and Gia are friends with my cousin. They have a place up in Seattle where they house LGBT kids who don't feel safe at home, or were kicked out."

"Seattle?! Seattle Washington!?"

"Yep."

"And you're going with them?"

Lance nodded, "Yeah... I'm too scared to find out what happens if I stay."

Keith sighed and took hold of one of Lance's hands with both of his.

 

_**Sometimes, you have to let people go.** _

 

And with that, the butterfly disappeared.

"And if I miss you too much?" Keith asked, sighing.

Lance smiled, "I'll come visit. It's okay."

Keith was/is a lovesick twelve-year-old. This is so stupid. He knows it's dramatic and stupid. But he's twelve, he can't help but feel emotional about it.

He tried to fix all of this. Tried to learn more about Lance. Keith thought he was taken, or kidnapped, or worse...

But all along he was just trying to run away. To feel safe again.

Keith smiled, and Lance smiled back, and that's when Keith stood up on the tips of his toes and kissed Lance's cheek, then wrapped his arms around his neck and fell into a hug. And Lance held him back.

A hug. His last hug with Lance McClain, at least, for now.

Keith kept trying to hold back tears in his hug, "C-Come visit soon, nerd. O-Okay?"

Lance smiled, "Yeah." 

"Lance!" 

Keith and Lance turned towards the voice.

"We're about to head out, buddy!" 

"Coming!" Lance called, he sighed, "Hey," the bracelet caught Lance's eye, "You forgot to give that to Shiro."

Keith looked at the bracelet, then back at Lance, "It's not for Shiro." Keith quickly un-latched the bracelet, "Give me your hand." Lance held his left hand out, and Keith latched it onto his hand.

Lance chuckled, "It's a little big for me."

"Then you'll grow into it." Keith smiled. Lance chuckled in response

"You're funny, Mullet." 

Keith rolled his eyes and stepped back, "It looks good on you."

Lance smiled at him, then stepped forward. Lance reached in his pocket and pulled out a weird necklace with some weird charm. He put it on Keith and looked at him for a moment. It was a long string, so Keith looked at the charm. But it wasn't just a charm. The charm had an "L" on it in a fancy font. And the other charm? It wasn't a charm. It was the ring from Lord of The Rings. The one Lance was going to wear for his Frodo costume.

"Keith looked back at Lance and took his hand, "Please... Stay."

Lance shook his head, "They only leave once every two months. I was lucky to get here when I did." Lance squeezed Keith's hand, "If I regret this, then eventually, I'll come back. But please... Please let me go."

Keith looked at Lance's hand in his. Hearing the raindrops falling around them, seeing their hands wet from the rain. Keith smiled, "I never made that bracelet for Shiro. I was planning on getting him a gift card.." Keith turned the bracelet. Engraved in the leather, Keith had carved out the words "Loverboy Lance."

Lance smiled, "You can't tell anyone about where I'm going." 

Keith looked at the ground, he was just on autopilot at this point, "Okay. Okay, I won't."

"Do you promise?"

A pause.

"Please... Promise me."

One more pause.

"I promise, Lance. I promise."

Lance grasped Keith's hands, "Keith Kogane, you take my breath away."

The two boys made eye contact and smiled at each other. Both of their hands clasped together. But that didn't last forever.

"Lance! We have to go!" 

Lance turned around, "Coming!" Then he turned back to Keith, "I promise," he choked, "I will see you again." Lance smiled one more time, Keith could see him tear up. He leaned over and kissed Keith's cheek. 

One last smile.

Lance gave him one last smile, then let go of Keith's hands.

He ran over to the van. They opened the door, and Lance took one step in. He looked back at Keith and smiled.

Keith gave a painful wave. Trying not to sob.

Lance waved back. 

And then he was in the truck. 

"We've got everyone!" Drew exclaimed to the person in the passenger seat before walking around to get in the driver's seat. 

Keith heard the door open.  
The click of the seatbelt.

The engine ignites. 

And before Keith knew it, the van was off in the distance. On it's way to Washington, carrying away his boy.

Keith felt tears dripping down his face.

"Goodbye."

 

6:30pm

Keith was sitting in the alleyway. No cars drove down this alleyway. Nobody was out walking in the rain.

Just Keith.

All alone.

He was sobbing, knuckles bloody from punching the brick walls of the buildings, the trash bags on the side of the road (those of which, had tin cans in them which cut open his hands). Everything was numb. Keith only felt hurt, and anger, and frustration.

_How could I have let him leave?_

_What the fuck is wrong with me?!_

_I'm here to STOP him from leaving, right?_

_I fucking failed. I failed him._

_His mom, his siblings..._

_Our friends._

_This is my fault.  
I COULD HAVE FUCKING STOPPED HIM!_

His sobs had turned into screams and chokes. The sky was full of thunder, loud and booming. It felt like the end of the world.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?!" Keith cried.

" _You can't change the past, Keith."_

Keith looked up and saw the butterfly. There it was, again. 

Taunting him.

 _Mocking_ him.

"What the fuck do you want."

_"Now do you remember, Keith?"_

 

"Remember?" Keith sniffed, "Fucking god, I just want to forget." Keith sobbed, grabbing his head, "Please just let me forget."

 

The butterfly flapped its wings, " _You do remember, don't you?"_

_"Keith, you can't change this. Do you remember now?"  
_

_"This is what happened all those years ago."_

Keith looked up, a chill went down his spine.

"No... No this didn't happen... I remember..."

_"Keith..."_

_" Now, you remember."_

The butterfly flapped over to Keith's again, hovering next to Keith's heart.

"I remember now? Remember this? But I..."

_"I can show you the truth, but you have to let me."_

"Show me what?" Keith was so confused, "What is this?"

Keith shivered and looked down at his body, he was glowing, "What's going on?"

_"Let me show you."_

 The butterfly flew into Keith's heart once again. The shivers came back.

The feeling of his body falling asleep, those pins and needles.

The almost... gentle burning feeling. 

Keith looked down at his body, and it was fading.

"What's happening to me?!"

_"Now it's time for me to bring you home."_

**That's when it all went black.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, guys! I'll be finishing up the next chapter as soon as possible! At the end of the final chapter, I'll be leaving a link to the music I was listening to while writing this (I call it "Keith's Playlist"). I'll also be trying to draw many of Keith's drawings that are mentioned in the story, including the photograph that everyone had up in their college dorms. I'm also going to be writing some one-shots after this comes off until I figure out what my next longer story is going to be. Feel free to message me on tumblr @princedemikind (yes I know it's similar to the Dirty Laundry author's tumblr, that was on accident). I'll be posting the art and one-shots on tumblr, and I may even post the one-shots on here if anyone wants that! :) Feel free to go to my tumblr to talk to me directly, or to ask me any questions! Thank you and I love you all <3


	7. Loverboy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter. Now that Lance has officially "disappeared", what's left for Keith, and what will happen when he goes back to 2017?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read the notes at the end of this chapter! They're really important and I have things I want you all to know <3

**Unknown Date**

**Unknown Time**

* * *

_Keith._

_Keith?_

* * *

Keith opened his eyes. He didn't know where he was. Where was he? Wherever it was, it was weird. It was a large area that was a milky blue color with clouds everywhere. Like he was floating in the sky. Keith looked down at his body.

_I'm 21 again._

No normal clothes, it was as if he was wearing a white bodysuit, but it was blended into his skin. Keith looked around, and he felt something blow past his shoulder.

"It's good to see you again."  
It was the butterfly. It flew around Keith's shoulders, then began to hover in front of Keith's face.

Keith shook his head, "What was the point of that?" He clenched his fist, "It already happened?"

_"I'm afraid so, Keith."_

Keith felt himself tearing up, "So I forgot about him? That makes no sense!"

The butterfly began to fly away.

"Hey..." Keith's eyes went wide, "No... No!" Keith began to run after the butterfly, "What is this?! Who are you?!"

The butterfly flapped a few more times, then flew around Keith's face multiple times, "Hey!" Keith coughed, "What the..." Keith collapsed, confused and pretty dazed. The butterfly was nowhere to be seen.

"Come on..." Keith mumbled from the ground, "Please don't leave me alone."

Keith heard breathing behind him, who then knelt down.

"Keith?"

His eyes went wide,  _No way._

"You're never alone."

Keith felt himself tear up, "No fucking way." He turned around, and there he was, kneeling down next to Keith.

"Lance?"

Those blue eyes were lit up, "Hey, Mullet."

Keith smiled.

Lance was obviously in his late teens or early twenties. His eyes were still big, cute freckles still dotted around his face.

Wait...

"This isn't real." Keith sighed, "You're not real, are you?"

Lance shook his head, "You're smart, Keith. You know I'm not."

Keith sat up, and the boys sat next to each other.

"So that was you?" Keith sighed, "The butterfly, the voice. The whole time, that was you?"

Lance nodded, "I'm afraid so."

Keith sighed and shook his head, "What was all that? What _are_ you?"

"I'm just here to help you remember." Lance smiled, then looked ahead of them.

"Then help me. I want to know. Was all of that just a memory?"

Lance stood up, "Pretty much, love." He looked down at Keith, "But there were a couple things that you messed up, I guess that's what the effects of drugs will give you."

Keith chuckled, "Yeah... Cigarette Daydreams didn't exist back then. What did I sing instead?"

"I Will Follow You Into The Dark. Death Cab, you emo."

Keith rolled his eyes, "I'm not that bad, now."

"Yeah sure, leather jackets and beanies. Definitely not emo." Lance sat down again, chuckling.

"Suck my fucking dick, dude." Keith laughed and lightly shoved Lance's face. Then he leaned on Lance's shoulder, Lance wasn't as tall now (Keith was just his 21-year-old height), "Effects of drugs? Is that why I forgot about you?"

Lance nodded, "You don't remember anymore. Those antidepressants, the alcohol... You were trying to forget about me," Lance chuckled, a hint of sadness in his voice, "And it worked, right?"

Keith looked down, "But... But how did I not meet Hunk.. Or Pidge... Or Matt... Or-"

Lance waved his hand over Keith's face, and then he saw it. Camille talking to his friends,

_"Guys, Keith suffered serious mental trauma from his abuse, we don't know what's going to happen when he comes back. But you guys have to do something for us. If Keith doesn't approach you or recognize you, don't tell him you were friends, we don't want to risk triggering something again."_

_"But isn't that sort of fucked up-"_

_"Please... For Keith's sake. Please."_

Then it all faded.

"They were worried about you, Keith. And I don't blame them." 

"How the FUCK would you know?!" Keith snapped, "You're a figment of my imagination!"

"Um, not true." Lance sounded very sure of himself, Keith couldn't tell if it was real or not, "Do you remember listening to that conversation? The night before you left for rehab?"

"No I-" Then it hit Keith.

That happened. Keith was upstairs eavesdropping. After hearing it, he snuck out, stole a bottle of vodka and four tins of gummy vitamins from the convenience store down the street, then got blackout drunk, he also tried to choke down all of the gummies. Needless to say, it didn't work. Keith woke up in rehab after god-knows how many days.

"I forgot everything, didn't I?" Keith shivered,

"That's not true either." Lance leaned on Keith's head, "You remember now."

_I do remember._

The clouds passed by those two. They sat in silence, Keith just enjoying Lance, even though he was just a figure of Keith's imagination. He remembers it all now. At least, he thinks so.

I remember.

_I remember._

"Lance..." Keith seemed to be zoning out, "Is this all a dream? You, this place, all of those days with you?"

Lance took ahold of Keith's hand, "I guess you could call it that." The blue-ness around them began to get lighter. More like the sun was shining.

Keith squeezed Lance's hand, anxiously, "What's happening?"

"It's time for you to wake up, Keith." Lance looked into the light, there was now a breeze blowing.

Keith gasped, "Wait... Wait no, you died!" Keith remembered and grabbed Lance's other hand, "You died, right?! There were the hospital beeps... A-And your eyes closed! And- You- You... You, You-"

"Shhh," Lance put his forefinger over Keith's mouth, "Hush, it's okay."

Keith was starting to cry, "B-but you're dead! Right?! I watched... Was that wrong? Did you die?!"

Lance was quiet.

"Lance?! LANCE FUCKING ANSWER ME!"

The wind began to blow harder, faster. Lance shook his head, perfectly calm, "I don't know the answer to that, Keith," He turned back to Keith, "I guess you just have to find out, Love."

Keith was crying, "I-I can't... I'm fucking scared, Lance... I'm-"

"Keith," Lance squeezed his hands, "Don't be afraid. It'll be okay." Lance wiped away Keith's tears, "Just don't forget about me again, okay?" He laughed.

_That laugh._

_Those big eyes._

"I won't."

"Good."

Lance put his hand over Keith's eyes and shut them.

"Wake up, Keith." Lance whispered, cupping Keith's cheeks. Keith felt him lean in to kiss him, "Wake up."

Just as their lips should've connected.

Keith was awake.

* * *

 

_"Keith is unlike anyone I've ever met."_

_"Do you think you'll go back for him one day."_

_"Maybe one day,"_

_"Like, how soon?"_

_"I don't know. For now, I need to focus on helping me. It's too difficult to fall in love when you're in middle school."_

_"In love? Jesus dude, you're layin' it on thick,"_

_"This is my truth for now. I love him. It's too hard for me. I'll come back when I'm older."_

_"How much older,"_

_"When we're out of high school, I'll come back. Maybe then it'll be safer for Gay or Bi people by then."_

_"Do you regret leaving?"_

_"You know, I don't know yet. But what's done is done."_

_"Do you think you'll love him in the future?"_

_"I guess I'll find out when the time comes."_

_-Lance talking to people in the van en route to Seattle, 2008_

 

* * *

 

 

**October 27th, 2017**

12:00pm

Keith woke up in a hospital room, laying on a shitty hospital bench. He sat up and looked around. He was wearing his shit from earlier this morning, and  _god_ he wished he wasn't. The black v-neck shirt that smelled like B.O., his black and red plaid pajama pants, the black slippers with Lions on them, his bedhead (or his "I was asleep or unconscious" head)... It was all a huge mess. Keith looked around the hospital room, and he could only focus on one thing... Or... Person...

"Rise and shine, sleepyhead."

"Lance..."

He was sitting up in the hospital bed. His freckles were more spread-out and dark. His hair was messy and curly. His eyes lit up the room. Still the color of the seas. Skin still a deep caramel color, but spotted with bruises and cuts.

Keith crossed his arms and leaned against a nearby wall, trying not to cry, "I'd say you looked better than the last time I saw you, but..." Keith gestured with his hand and the boys both started laughing, "You're looking pretty similar."

Lance laughed, "Yeah, yeah, I know."

Keith just took a second to look at Lance, "How did you end up in the hospital?"

"Heh, funny story," Lance sat up a little more and ran his fingers through his hair, "I was driving up here to see your ass. And my family, and my other friends."

"You drive now? Don't you need a parent to help with that?"

Lance looked around and shrugged, smiling, "I'm twenty, nerd. Or twenty one. Or something, hit my head. Whatever- I could do it myself."

_Damn... Twenty years old._

_Time sure does fly, doesn't it?_

Keith chuckled, "I'm just teasing." They smiled at each other for a few minutes. Just sitting there, admiring the other. Keith interrupted it after a few minutes by getting up to sit on the edge of Lance's bed. He offered his hand and Lance placed his in Keith's, "Did you get in an accident?"

Lance nodded, "Some asshat slammed into me from behind. Scary shit."

Keith winced and nodded, "I can tell, I'm sorry, dude."

Lance shrugged and smiled, "I survived, didn't I?"

Keith sighed and squeezed Lance's hand, "I'm so glad you did," He looked down at Lance's hand. There was an IV tube in his arm, but below it...

"You still have the bracelet..." Keith was tearing up.

Lance looked down at his arm, then back up at Keith, smiling, "Of course I do, how could I get rid of it?"

Keith wiped his eyes, "It fits you now... I told you that you'll grow into it." Keith looked down at his chest.

_I'm wearing the necklace..._

Keith pulled the necklace up so it wasn't underneath the shirt. The ring's silver finish came off years ago and was now scratched and dirty, but he never realized that the "L" charm was gone. He forgot that he had one there in the first place.

"I guess my moms took the 'L' charm off when I went to rehab." Keith sighed.

Lance shrugged, "I heard about that," Lance raised an eyebrow, "So, did you forget me for years or something? Shiro was saying you went to rehab soon after I left, and when you came back you had no memory of us being friends."

"A little more than friends," Keith cringed at himself, "I kind of repressed that as much as I could... It was painful, man..." Lance placed his other hand on top of Keith's, "I remember though... I just avoided it for years..."

"Hey, I hear that tone in your voice, Keith. You have no right to feel bad.  _I_ left. Okay?" Lance leaned on Keith's shoulder, "I'm sorry."

"I know..." Keith squeezed Lance's hand, having that memory back was more painful than what Keith thought it would

Lance shook his head, seemingly at himself, "Ojalá sepas cuánto lo siento." Lance seemed to be directing it more at himself than Keith.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Keith put his arm around Lance and sighed, "Where do we go from here, Loverboy?"

"Hmm?" Lance looked confused,

"Like," Keith began, "You've been in Seattle for  _nine_ fucking years. The reason you left is because we were seen kissing. And I'm still not completely over it and... What's going to happen now? Are we going to be friends? Are we going to-"

"Keith," Lance leaned towards him and put his hand on Keith's shoulder, "Let's go slowly, okay?"

Keith was shaking, he was anxious. Understandably so. He just had a huge flood of memories come back at once.

"Lance?"

"Yes?"

"Did you cry when I played that song on the guitar?"

Lance nodded, "Nobody had ever played me a song, Keith. Nobody."

"Has anybody played one since?"

"Nope."

Keith smiled, "Does your sister still have the guitar of hers?"

Lance shrugged, "I haven't seen them in nine years, Keith. I hope she does, but I don't know."

Keith was beaming, "Wait here." He kissed Lance's forehead and walked towards the door. Then he realized he actually kissed him, "Uh... Sorry."

They smiled, and then Keith was out of the room.

12:45pm

Keith walked out of the hospital room, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

_Man, iPhone, I'll never take you for granted again._

He dialed Shiro's number, his friends should be on their way back to the DVC campus for their finals. Either that or they were just going to get some rest.

"You awake?" Shiro answered,

"Yeah... What happened?"

"The second Lance woke up, you collapsed. Honestly, Hunk thought you had a heart attack."

Keith chuckled, face red from the forehead kiss, "I suppose you could call it that," That earned a couple of chuckles, (Keith figured out that he was on speaker phone in the car)

"Dude I thought you were dead!" Matt exclaimed, 

"Matt?" Keith was confused, "You didn't come with us!"

"Okay, rude." Matt exclaimed, "Allura's van ran out of gas so I came to the rescue."

"Sounds legit," Keith sighed. He was pretty thankful that his normal voice and way of speaking was back.

"So," Pidge chimed in, "What did you call about?"

"Well I..." Keith heard a ukulele in the distance, and she was singing next to a lady with the same caramel-colored skin as Lance, "Nevermind, I was just curious about you guys."

"Okay," it was Matt again this time, "Dude I left my motorcycle there when I took Allura's van. You can ride her home, just don't hurt her."

Keith chuckled, "I wouldn't harm your baby, Matt. I promise." The playing stopped, and the two laughed, Keith heard them talking about 'Uncle Lance'.

"I have to go guys," Keith lowered his phone, "I'll catch y'all later." He hung up before they had a chance to respond. He walked over to the girl and the woman as slowly as he could. The girl caught sight of Keith before the woman.

"Mommy, is that the guy that fell when your brother woke up?" She held her mom's hand tightly, she smiled at Keith, who awkwardly waved back to her.

The woman turned around to look at Keith, and Keith recognized her immediately.

"Gabriella, right?"

"Hey, Keith." She smiled at Keith, then turned to her daughter, "Find Papa, okay, Mia?"

"Okay, momma." Mia smiled at Keith, "Bye, Mister!" She put her ukulele down on her mom's lap, then ended up jumping off of her chair and running off.

Gabriella moved over and patted her hand down on the seat next to her, "Come on, Mullet."

Keith sat down and rolled his eyes, "You remember me, huh?"

She nodded, "You're the one who played guitar for my brother in the park, right? I remember driving you two the park and you guys left with my guitar," She smiled to herself, "I got that guitar back from Hunk on Halloween, that was a shitty one. Hunk put stickers on it to make me happier. It didn't really work."

The two laughed, and Keith leaned back in the chair. He paused, then asked a question that was on his mind.

"Whatever happened to that boyfriend that your mom had?" Keith sighed.

"My older brother beat the shit out of him." Gabriella twirled her hair on her fingers, "He smacked our mom, then Anton, our brother, just went nuts. The shitbag left the next mourning after giving Anton a stern look." She mimicked an angry face and went into a deep voice, "'I hope I'll never see you putas again'!" She mimicked, "He didn't even say the whole goddamn sentence! Bitch could barely say a lick of Spanish!" She burst into a weird fit of laughter, "Sorry, I laugh thinking about him. He was scary for sure, but it's kind of funny looking back on it, he didn't know how to be a normal person."

Keith was a bit dumbfounded, that was kind of hard for him to follow.

"So Anton's an older brother, any other family members?" Keith was curious and didn't know how else to get off of the topic of the douchebag ex of their mother.

"Yeah, It's Anton, who's 31; Me, 29; the twins Alicia and Sonia, both 23; then Lance, 20 now I think?; then Daniel, 16; and the youngest, Joel, 12."

Keith sat up, "Seven kids?! Jesus, I can barely bear with myself!"

Gabriella chuckled at that, "Yeah, our poor mom. She always took care of us though, bless her poor heart. And she still has Daniel and Joel to deal with," She paused, "Not necessarily  _deal with_ , per say... Just, we're all a lot," She gestured to herself, "Like, I talk a whole lot, if you can understand me, then you might as well be part of the family, cause we're all a big bunch of mess."

That made both of them chuckle, then Gabriella's smile faded, "It got so bad for us after Lance disappeared, I don't know how Mom held us together. I was 20 and had just moved out, Sonia and Alicia were trying to figure out high school, and Daniel was wondering where his big brother went." She was tearing up, "Joel doesn't even remember him. Nothing... He was three when Lance disappeared."

_This was partially my fault... All of it... What did I do..._

Keith sighed and looked at the ceiling, "I was a year older than him, but I knew Lance." He sighed, letting out a sound that sounded like a laugh, but was filled with sorrow, "He was one of the best things that ever happened. One of the best people I've ever known. Kind of flirty but funny and..." He laughed, "Just a  _massive_ dick sometimes."

They both laughed at that, Gabriella was wiping away tears, "He talked about you a lot, you know." Keith looked over at her, "You were someone important to him. Lance may get... or got attached to people too easily, but he really liked you."

_A little more than 'Liked'.. Heh..._

"Keith?"

"Hm?"

"Did you like my brother?"

"I loved your brother." Keith felt himself tear up, "He was the first one of my friends that didn't do drugs. He was a ray of sunshine. He had these eyes and this hair and his hugs were always warm and..." Keith wiped his eyes, "He made me feel wanted. Like someone wanted to be my friend... Wanted to be around me, liked my company. Liked me for what I am instead of what I become when I smoked pot." Still crying, he didn't know how to stop, "I tried so hard to forget him when he disappeared... I fucked myself so bad just to even forget his name... And..." Keith shrugged, "It worked!" Keith found himself sobbing, "It was bad, alcohol, anti-depressants, fucking gummy vitamins," They both laughed through their tears when Keith said gummy vitamins, even though they probably shouldn't have, "It fucking sucked, you know? I just wanted to forget... I  _did_ forget... I..." Keith couldn't get a word out anymore, he was sobbing, "I just... I wanted to- I wanted.. I..."

"Hey, it's okay, dude..." Gabriella gave him a hug, and Keith just clung to her arm.

"I don't even know why I'm crying-"

"I know what you mean, it's okay."

His tears were staining Gabriella's baby blue sweater and he could feel his face getting puffy and red.

_I forgot about him..._

_I forgot... What's wrong with me..._

_Nothing, Keith._

Keith immediately sat up and wiped his eyes, then looked around.

"That's *sniff* pretty cool," Gabriella smiled.

Keith looked where she was looking, and there was a blue butterfly sitting on the ukulele.

_Nothing's wrong. You remember now._

_It's okay._

Keith shivered.

_Go back to him._

_You said you wanted to know him, didn't you?_

Keith smiled, and the butterfly flew away. He picked up the ukulele and smiled,

"Hey, Gab?"

"Nobody calls me 'Gab'," She laughed, "Yes?"

"Mind if I borrow this?"

She wiped her eyes and beamed, "I don't mind at all."

"Thank you." Keith took her hand and squeezed it, "So much."

Then Keith stood up and began to walk back to Lance's room.  
Someone was about to be serenaded with "Cigarette Daydreams".

 

**October 30th, 2017**

6:24pm

The car ride home from the hospital was going pretty well so far. They were riding in Keith's beat-up Volkswagen Jetta. The black paint was peeling off, but the car was still in one piece and run really well, so Keith practically lived in it. It currently smelled of fries and burgers and spilled ketchup, with milkshakes sitting in the cupholders. They had stopped at In-N-Out, so there was a nice little college-vibe going on. Lance sat in the passenger seat, looking much better than he did a few days ago.

Lance's hair was still curly, but the back and sides were shaved pretty short in order to put stitches in due to the car accident from a couple of days ago. He was wearing a red flannel over a blue short-sleeved shirt. The shirt said "Starlord" on it, with a picture of said Superhero's mask from Guardians of The Galaxy. He was wearing ripped black jeans and a pair of Batman converse, all of it looked like they've been worn for years.

Speaking of the guardians, they were listening to the soundtrack from the second movie and singing along as if they had been friends for years. Singing call and response as if it was second-nature.

"Mr. Blue Sky,"

"Please tell us why,"

"You had to hide away for-"

"SOOO LOOONG!!" Lance sang in a jokey way. 

Keith was laughing. He didn't sing a whole lot, but Lance made it a lot more enjoyable, somehow. Lance knew every song on that soundtrack even better than the back of his hand. The songs played over and over again as they sat in the traffic. 

Keith leaned back into the chair, tightening his ponytail with one hand then turning the music down, "This traffic fucking sucks. I promised your mom I'd have you back by seven and it's almost six-thirty. Jesus, I knew we shouldn't have stopped at In-N-Out..."

"Dude, it's my mom." Lance smiled, "She won't be mad, she knows about the rush-hour traffic."

Keith sighed, "If you say so."

They continued on the freeway trying to not go insane in the traffic.

"Can I be honest with you about something?"

Keith turned to Lance, "If it's mean, keep it to yourself, I'm mean to myself enough as it is." They both chuckled at that even though it was painfully true.

"I get that," Lance shook his head, "But no, I was going to say that you're just as cute as when I first met you."

Keith rolled his eyes, "Fully grown into the gay-side of you, huh?"

"Pretty much. I'm also a huge flirt."

"Isn't that a bad thing?"

"I think so, but I'm lucky enough to know that I do it." Lance sighed.

"You're funny," Keith reached over and lightly punched Lance's arm, then went back and grabbed the wheel, "Still as much of a Loverboy as ever." Keith side, "Lance, did you miss me?"

Lance looked over at Keith, "Of  _course_ I missed you." Lance reached over and took Keith's right hand, leaving his left on the wheel, "How could I not?"

Keith shrugged, "I don't know, just curious."

"You shrug a lot."

Keith rolled his eyes.

"You also do that a lot."

"Old habits die hard, old friend." Keith smiled and let go of Lance's hand to turn up the volume on the music.

_"Listen to the wind bloooow, watch the sun riiise..."_

Lance leaned his head back. The sun was setting, getting sun in both of the boys' eyes. Traffic was moving a little faster, they were almost to Lance's house.

"Fucking love this song." Keith turned it up a little more.

"It always reminded me of you." Lance chimed, looking out of the window, the boys were just waiting for the chorus.

"And if you don't love me now," Keith began, softly,

"You will never love me again."

"I can still hear you sayin'-"

"You will never break the chain." Keith was bobbing his head and tapping his foot, trying to keep his focus on the road, but getting lost in the beat. Lost in the way Lance was smiling and playing air guitar, mouthing every word.

"Lance McClain, you take my breath away." Keith smiled.

Lance smiled back, still bobbing his head, "Mind if I do something only a dumb college kid would do?"

"Please do."

Lance leaned in and kissed Keith. It was a much better kiss than when they were twelve-year-olds. Lance's hand was on Keith's jaw, and kissing him... Kissing Lance... It felt so  _right_.

"Hey!" Keith laughed, breaking the kiss, "Don't distract me or it'll be your second car accident this week."

Lance put his hands up in defense, "Apologies, Mister Mullet."

Keith rolled his eyes, "Fuck off."

"It's literally in a ponytail right now,"

"It's not a mullet!"

"Just like how you're not emo!"

The two bickered, but with smiles on their faces. It was as if they were both grown up, but were still dumb kids. Doing dumb things. Wanting to do dumb things like make-out in cars.

Keith had gone to see Lance multiple times in the hospital before they got him out of there. They had talked about the dumb shit Lance had gotten up to in Seattle and the dumb shit Keith had gotten up to still in Oakland. Keith had told him about when a girl in rehab tried to kill a seagull, when he was in high school and had to write a poem about time and how he barely graduated, how Keith's taking a bunch of art classes at DVC, all of it. Lance talked about how he was able to be homeschooled with a bunch of kids at his LGBT-house-thing. Lance wanted to introduce the "Keith" they had all heard about for years.

They had shared so much, now they want to know each other.

"It's funny, huh?" Keith leaned on his left hand, keeping his right hand on the wheel.

"What is?" Lance asked,

"How it's like we've known each other for years. We only had a couple of days together when we were younger... But... Those were the best days I've ever had." Keith looked at Lance, "The best days I've ever had... I've had with you."

Lance took Keith's hand (As Keith put his left on the wheel), "I want more of those days, why not make more?"

"I'd like that." Keith beamed.

"As would I," Lance kissed Keith's hand, "You take my breath away, Keith Kogane."

Keith let out a huge sigh, "You have no idea what you do to my breath." He paused, "That made no sense."

The two laughed as Keith was nearing the freeway exit they had to get off at.

"What should we do now?" Lance thought aloud, "Where do we go from here?"

Keith thought for a second. As he pulled off of the freeway, it came to him.

"I have an idea."

"What kind of idea?"

Keith looked over once more and smiled, "I'll tell you after dinner."

 

 

* * *

 

_"Are we ever going to be able to cosplay Lord of The Rings?"_

_"Of course, Pigeon. I wouldn't have it any other way."_

-The first thing that Pidge said to Lance when he woke up, October 27th, 2017.

* * *

_"So we're gonna have a boys night?"_

_"You bet! And Pidge is going to be there and Shiro and Matt and Keith! It's going to be just like old times!"_

_"So they're officially using 'Pidge' huh?"_

_"Until they can think of a different name, they told us to give them a nickname. We stole "Pigeon" from you."_

_"I'm glad to know I was remembered in good light."_

_"I always knew you'd come back, buddy. I knew nothing bad happened to you."_

_"Dude, I missed you so much."_

_"I missed you too."_

_"Hunk? Does your mom still have free breakfasts for your friends?"_

_"You're a damn fool if you think she doesn't."_

_"I'll come join you some time."  
_

_"That'd be awesome. I swear my mom missed you like you were own kid."_

_"I felt like she was another mom at times, dude. I'll give her a big hug when I see her."_

 

-Phone call between Lance and Hunk, October 31st, 2017

* * *

_"Dude, Hunk called Pigeon and I about boys night!"_

_"What about it?"_

_"Can it be at a cheesecake factory?"_

_"Why the fuck would you want to have boys night at a Cheesecake Factory?"_

_"I brought a deck of Uno cards once and it was the best decision of my whole life."_

_"Oh no."_

_"Oh yes."_

_"Dude, I fucking missed you. Please never change."_

_"The day I change is the day I die. Bury me with my memes and Uno cards."_

_"You're a fucking loser."_

_"Like you're any different."_

_"And that's why we're friends, aren't we?"_

 

-Phone call between Lance and Matt, October 31st, 2017

* * *

 

  _"Hey, Sylvie."_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Do you remember me?"_

_"I remember Mom telling me that you got me crayons."_

_"Which mom?"_

_"Camille. Biological."_

_"Did you remember anything really good about me?"_

_"I remember you made my brother pretty damn happy. Why?"_

_"I missed him. We're getting coffee tomorrow after he gets out of classes."  
_

_"Tell him to grab me a gift card, it's my friend's birthday soon and I don't have time to get her anything."_

_"Maybe instead of getting her something, just make it?"_

_"You sound like a dumbass."_

_"No, really. Make her a bracelet or something. I'm sure she'd love it. People treasure things like that."_

-Text messages between Lance and Sylvie, November 1st, 2017

* * *

  _"I do hope you're finding your time back enjoyable."_

_"I am, you doing well?"_

_"I got into the University of Cambridge! I'll be going next year!"_

_"Jesus, Allura, still as smart as ever."_

_"You flatter me, I'm not that smart. I just wanted a chance to stay with my parents, I honestly never thought I'd see them again after I left to live with my Uncle."_

_"Coran is an awesome Uncle!"_

_"That he is. But I miss my parents, you know? Studying there will be fun anyways."_

_"You're right, we can hang out before you leave, right?"_

_"Of course! I wouldn't want it any other way!"_

_"Great, I shouldn't be on the phone, I'm driving."_

_"JESUS, LANCE! GET OFF THE PHONE!"_

_"Okay, okay! I'll call you later!"_

_"Good, tell me how it goes! Love you!"_

_"Love you too!_

-Phone call between Allura and Lance, November 1st, 2017

* * *

_"Go get 'em dude!"_

_" You're not a helpful wingman."_

_"Come on, let me help! If you need anything, text me! You got this!"_

_"Shiro?"_

_"What's up?"_

_"Thank you."_

_"Please don't thank me, just let me be here for you."_

_"I'll try. Thank you so much."_

_" :) <3"_

_":) :D <3"_

 

-Text Messages between Shiro and Lance, November 1st, 2017 

* * *

 

**November 1st, 2017**

5:30pm

Keith sat alone, sketching a picture of Lance with butterfly wings. He sat at a table sipping his rose-boba tea, running his fingers through his hair. His hair was tied up in a ponytail, as it was when driving Lance home from the hospital. Lance seemed to enjoy the ponytail, so it made a return. Keith's messenger bag was draped over the back of his chair. He was wearing a red and black flannel over a black shirt that said in white ink, "No Mistakes, Just Happy Accidents". He dawned some ripped black jeans, and his black Pride 2016 converse (which were a gift from Matt and Pidge). Keith was sitting at a table outside. The weather was warm, with a nice breeze weaving its way through the air. The sun will be setting soon. Keith looked up in the direction of the wind, seeing the autumn colors of the trees and flowers glow. There were normal coffee house sounds coming from the building Keith was sitting outside of. Everything was as it should be. It was just missing something.

"Keith?"

Keith turned towards the voice, and up trotted a smiling Lance. His hair had begun growing back already, as the sides were beginning to look curly once again. Lance was wearing a navy blue sweater with white stripes, some deep navy jeans, and the same Batman converse as before. 

Lance chuckled as he pulled out the chair sitting across from Keith, "Of course you wanted us to meet at Elle's. You're a cheesy nerd."

Keith smiled, "You're one to talk," eyeing the two daisies that Lance was holding.

"Yeah, uh..." Lance sat down and awkwardly shrugged, "I left my wallet at home and needed the money for my boba so," He gestured to the daisies, "I stole these from Hunk's family's lawn. They probably won't mind"

Keith rolled his eyes, but was still smiling. Lance handed Keith the daisies, which he took with a small, sarcastic bow, "Thank you, sir."

"No problem, Madame Mullet."

"Lance McClain, I swear to god..." Keith shook his head in disapproval, but Lance was beaming.

So... Maybe Keith could let this one slide.

_You seem to be having fun._

A butterfly flew behind Lance and landed on a bush beside the boys.

_I'm guessing this is a goodbye._

_You don't need me anymore, you have your memory back._

_Just remember not to forget._

_If you need me again, I'll return to you._

_Okay. I think I'll be okay. Thank you._

_Goodbye, Keith._

_Goodbye._

  
Keith's eyes followed the butterfly as it flew off into the distance, probably for Keith to never see it again.

"Keith? Earth to Keith Kogane?"

"Hmm?" Keith turned his head back to Lance,

"Did I just see you wave goodbye to a butterfly?" Lance laughed, "You're funny."

Keith could feel his face getting red, "Heh... Yeah, sorry. That's kind of weird."

"I don't mind, it was cute," Lance shrugged, then clapped his hands together, "So!"

"So... What?"

"How is a date with your 6th-grade crush supposed to go?"

Keith laughed, "I wish I knew, dude."

Lance awkwardly shrugged, "Should we just pretend that this is a tinder or grindr date? Start from scratch?"

Keith looked at Lance and leaned on his right hand, "If you want to do that, then I'm all for it."

"Might as well give it a try."

Keith sighed and smiled, still leaning on his hand, "Okay, darlin'."

Lance reached over and grabbed Keith's boba tea.

"Hey-!"

"Hold on, hold on, trust me on this."

Keith rolled his eyes, "Fine."

Lance smiled, stirring the tea and taking a sip. Followed by him leaning on his hand, "So, love?"

"Yes?" Keith smiled,

Lance smiled back, eyes sparkling, "What's your name?"

 

_ The End _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH IT'S THE END! For the people that have been following since September, you know I suffered from a massive case of writers block after chapter three, so thank you for bearing with me<3 For the people that have read all of this, thank you, I love you all! So first off, I fixed Keith and Lance's ages cause somehow I realized a couple of days ago that the Keith couldn't have been 19 in 2017 if he was 12 in 2008 (I was originally going to have this take place in elementary school, but I thought it clashed with what I wanted this story to be about). I've been getting help fixing the few spanish lines that are in my story, if there are any other lines that I should fix, let me know:) I get that a lot of these chapters were fluff, but that's how I write. I'm not the best writer but I wanted to tell this story, so here it is. I'll be leaving a playlist link here soon to "Keith's Playlist" (aka what I listened to when writing this). And feel free to message any of my tumblr blogs @princedemikind (which is specifically for my Ao3 or other fics) or @mangokind (shitpost account), or just leave a comment! I try to respond to all of my comments. I'll also be writing some more one-shots until I can think of more long-term projects. I'll also continue to edit this as I see fit, because this story for sure isn't perfect, but I often mis-type things or read over very obvious grammatical errors in my own writing, so I'll be continuing to edit ALL OF MY CHAPTERS, I know they need the work lol.  
> Thank you all so much for reading. I love you all<3


	8. Your Name Playlist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Songs I listened to while writing this story. I hope you guys find these songs interesting and as enjoyable as (my story's) Keith and I do:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll continue adding to this when I find songs that remind me of the story (or when I remember some I listened to lol)

[I Can Barely Breathe - Manchester Orchestra](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mb5_miMF-p0&index=53&list=PLwDw0u_pI0aFQDKygT-OkD1PlVk_kTOuu)

[Adeline - Alt-J](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XwU8H6e8Ts&index=80&t=0s&list=PLwDw0u_pI0aFQDKygT-OkD1PlVk_kTOuu)

[Something in The Way - Nirvana](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cyw5OQ4EWds&index=87&list=PLwDw0u_pI0aFQDKygT-OkD1PlVk_kTOuu)

[Friendly Advice - Bad Books](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRFS25ekm8Y&list=PLwDw0u_pI0aFQDKygT-OkD1PlVk_kTOuu&index=90)

[Disenchanted - My Chemical Romance (I know, emo)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95hfNjZictY)

[Buzzcut Season - Lorde](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pstVCGyaUBM&list=PLwDw0u_pI0aFQDKygT-OkD1PlVk_kTOuu&index=91)


	9. Author Notes<3

Hey guys! It's the author here!

I just wanted to make an announcement that I'm turning this story into a comic! It'll be on my instagram: @Demikind and the official insta for the comic @klanceyn. I don't think I'm ready to let go of this story yet haha.

I want to thank you guys for all of the support I've gotten since I've finished this story and on my other works in progress. I have no motivation to write right now because high school is a bitch.

But my DM's are always open on instagram, and on tumblr (@mangokind)! I'd love to chat with you guys, please message me. I need friends.

Thank you guys for everything. I love you all<3

Hugs,

Demikind


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